#look it doesn't matter if we haven't interacted much but i WILL jump into your dms and hash it out for fun :3

[luscinai]

small mains and/or affiliates call in here btw—

[perpetualproductions]

If We Were Vampires (Pt. 9)

- There's a party tonight?

- Jordan decides to stay in

- Nevermind. Jordan needs to go to the party.

CW: Blood. Violence. More blood. Mentions of drugs/drug use. Same w/Alcohol.

[a/n: ngl, kinda let the depression win with this one. Words just weren't wording when I wrote it. But hey, still wrote. Anyways, sorry, ig. Hope it's readable.]

3k words

<-Previous| Next->

Jordan and Marie were both sitting at one of the picnic tables in the quad, sharing a sandwich from the cafeteria. They had spent most of the afternoon outside now, just walking around, spending time together and simply enjoying each other's company. They had fallen into casual conversation when they were suddenly approached by Cate and Andre. 

“Well look who decided to show their face?” Cate said, sliding into the open spot on Marie's left.

“Yo, I'm gonna need to know what you took that left you MIA for four fucking days, dude. Seriously, where'd you go that night?” Andre said, slinging an arm around Jordan's shoulders, taking the spot on their right. 

Jordan just forces a laugh. “Trust me, you don't want to know. Definitely never doing that again.”

Andre jokingly narrows his eyes. “Fine. Keep your secrets.” Andre drops his arm, giving Jordan some space. 

“Doesn't matter. There'll be plenty of opportunities to get fucked up later tonight.” Cate winks, nudging Marie a bit, who just gives a tight smile and nods in response. 

Jordan's a little confused from the interaction. “What's tonight?” 

“Party in the woods. There's a clearing about a mile out from Dusty's, right next to a lake. There's gonna be a bonfire and everything.” Cate responded. 

“And rumor has it Dusty's supplier is bringing out some of the good shit this time.” Andre added. 

“I thought Marie told you?” Cate questioned, looking at Marie. 

Marie just looked at Jordan a bit wide eyed. She did mean to tell them, but then the whole vampire thing came to light and Marie was sure partying was gonna be the last thing on Jordan's mind. “I uh, well Jordan's been really busy, haven't really had time to bring up-” 

“It's fine. Don't think I'm gonna go anyways.” Jordan interrupts. “I am still pretty busy.” They tried to reason. 

“Oh come on, you're always busy, Jordan. It's Saturday! Come get fucked up with your friends!” Andre tries to convince them. 

“Yeah, since when does Jordan Li say no to a party?” Cate adds.

“Since I completely blacked out from one a couple days ago. And I seriously can't afford to do that again when I have so much work to do. Sorry guys. Maybe next time.” Jordan said, definitely. They switched to female form as they got up and began to walk away from the table, knowing they wouldn't stop trying to convince Jordan to go to the party if they stayed. They were right. Usually Jordan would jump at the chance to escape their response for a night, but they really weren't sure how they'd behave in a crowd of people, blood pumping through their veins from the dancing and drugs. Just sounded like a recipe for disaster. Also, there may be a touch of ptsd, given they actually died at the last party they went to. Or adjacent. Whatever, it was the middle of the woods, they're a vampire, they've seen this movie before. They weren't gonna risk it. 

They could hear Marie call their name from behind them, but they didn't feel like talking at the moment, so they rounded a tree and sped away once they were out of sight.

–

Jordan spent the rest of the day working out in the student gym, then going to study in their dorm, alone. Just trying to keep them busy, taking their mind off of anything vampire for the rest of the day. As much as they could anyway, cause they still had to drink blood every now and again.

Except this time, as they sat at their desk studying for what felt like hours, they felt their stomach growl, the hunger seeping in. They were on a bit of a roll, so they ignored it as much as they could until they finally caved, dropping their pencil and rolling over to their mini fridge. As they swung the door open, they froze… There was only one bag left. Shit. 

“Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit-” Jordan stumbled out of their chair, kneeling in front of the fridge, digging through to make sure there weren't any bags hiding in the back (not that it even went back that far). “Shit!” Jordan yelled, slamming their hand down on the fridge door. A loud crack followed by a thump rang out as the fridge door broke off its hinges, falling on the floor. Jordan moved back a bit as it happened, a hand clutching their head, fingers tangling into their bob. “Fuck…” Jordan sighed, sliding down till they were sat on the floor. They angrily kick the broken door away from them and reach into the fridge, grabbing the last blood bag, ripping it open and drinking it all down. 

They tried to savor it, take it slow, but they were too hungry. They finished the bag in seconds, throwing it to the side. Jordan groaned as they clutched their head in their hands. They were a bit fucked here. They were doing a decent job at rationing their “meals” and making sure they were pacing themselves and not drinking too many bags at once. But that morning sort of fucked them. When they got spooked, accidentally biting Marie's lip, they just lost control a bit and drank down like five fucking bags at once. Shit. They were gonna have to get more, and unfortunately, they only had one supplier…

–

Jordan made their way over to Justine Garcia’s dorm, banging on the door. “Hey! Open the fuck up!” Jordan yelled. They didn't want to bring any attention to themselves, but they were pretty on edge at the moment. They kept knocking on the door, but didn't get a response. 

Jordan sighed, thinking Justine was already at the party by now. Fuck. They were gonna have to go, confront her, and either convince her to come back to give them more blood bags, or drag her back. No- they really shouldn't make a scene. They can't make a scene. 

Jordan's about to walk away, but stops. They turn back around to the door in front of them, getting close to it to see if they can sense what they're looking for on the other side. They couldn't sense anyone on the other side. No fresh blood flowing through veins or breathing can be heard, but they think they can smell a faint scent of blood. Bagged blood, but still blood.

Fuck it. Jordan thought. They grabbed the door handle and yanked it down, effectively breaking it off. They push the door open, taking a scan of the room before walking in. But, as they go to step in, they can't.

"What the fuck?" Jordan mutters to themselves. They try to step through again, but can't. It's as if an invisible force is keeping them from crossing the threshold into the dorm. Getting frustrated with whatever the fuck this was, Jordan stepped back and tried to run as hard as they could through this invisible force, but they just ended up being pushed back. "Fuck!" They exclaimed, finally giving up. There was blood right inside that room and for whatever fucking reason, they couldn't walk in to get it. Fucking hell.

Jordan took a deep breath, trying to ground themselves. Their hunger was very present, but they couldn't let it take over. They just needed to push it down, go to the party, get in and get out, and everything would be fine. 

–

Jordan shuffled their way through the crowd in their male form, the cold night air barely noticeable while in the sea of bodies, so crowded you'd think you were actually indoors. Jordan focused on their breathing as they waded through, letting the hundreds of heartbeats fade in with the pounding music. Their eyes scanned around, trying not to linger on any necks, looking for one particular person, and honestly having no luck so far.

Jordan decided to move closer to the lake where there seemed to be less people. They turned to face the water and took a deep breath, trying to focus their hearing on the gentle lapping water of the lake, doing their best to shove down the incessant hunger clawing at them from the inside. They literally shook themselves off as they turned back around, determined to find the other vamp and get more blood bags on their hands and into their stomach. 

They scanned through the crowd from the outside, able to focus in more now that they were out of the chaos in the middle. They spot a few familiar faces, the usual Godolkin party goers. They see dusty near the pit snorting powders with a couple others, they see Cate and Andre drinking and laughing it up, and then their eyes land on the one Marie Moreau. There she was, as beautiful as ever, dancing in the crowd, hands reaching to the sky as her body moved to the rhythm of the music. They couldn't take their eyes off her, they barely even noticed Emma dancing next to her, seemingly preoccupied with some random curly haired freshman. Jordan couldn't help themselves as they began to walk towards Marie, almost forgetting why they came to this party in the first place. 

But, before Jordan could make it to her, they noticed someone else walk up to her. A douchey looking (in Jordan's opinion), 6-foot-something, blonde guy made his way up behind Marie and just blatantly placed his hands on her waist. The proximity alone made Jordan's blood boil, but the touching was too far. Even as Marie began to turn around, her hands coming up, ready to push the guy away from her, Jordan was there in the blink of an eye, throwing Marie off for a second. She watched as Jordan (who came out of nowhere to her), pushed the guy so hard he fell to the ground with a thump. 

“What the FUCK do you think you're doing!” Jordan barked at the guy, looking down at him. 

The guy got back up, brushing the dirt off of himself. “Hey man, what the fuck’s your problem?!” The dude shouted back. It was clear this guy was a bit drunk, Jordan smelling the alcohol off his breath as the guy got up in their face. “I was just asking the lady if she wanted to-”

Jordan, letting their heightened emotions get the better of them, just swung at the guy, hitting him square in the face. A loud crack could be heard, along with a cry coming from the guy they just hit. They watched him stumble back, clutching his face. Jordan didn't need him to move his hands to know that they had broken the guys nose, smelling the blood oozing out and running down his face. 

“Jordan, what the fuck?!” Marie's voice pulled them back.  They looked back at her, clocking her worried, yet pissed off face. But Jordan already felt themselves hurdling off the edge with all the heightened feeling and the presence of blood, they just yelled back at her. 

“What do you mean, “what the fuck?!” That asshole was fucking all over you!” They shouted, not paying attention to said asshole being ushered away from the situation by some other party goers. Jordan could tell by the fading scent of fresh blood moving further away, which just reminded them of their hunger even more. 

“Yeah, and I was gonna take care of it til you came running in, arms swinging like an idiot!” Marie shouted back. Jordan's head was too busy ringing from all the overwhelming sensations, they didn't even notice their chest was still heaving. Marie took the time to notice they were still in the middle of a large crowd, sighing and grabbing Jordan's arm to drag them away. 

They stopped a good ten feet away from the crowd, just at the forest treeline. Jordan switched to their female form and pulled themselves out of Marie's hold. “Hey, how about you calm down for a second.” Marie said, clearly still peeved from the whole situation.

“I'm trying to be calm! Okay, Moreau? I'm fucking trying, it's just-” Jordan clutches their head, trying to get their thoughts together, but all they could focus on was Marie's pounding pulse. “Fuck, I-I’m sorry. I shouldn't even fucking be here-” 

“-Then why are you here, Jordan? I thought you weren't coming?” Marie asked, crossing her arms. 

“I wasn't gonna come, but then I- I don't know. I thought I'd be fine- that I'd have it under control, but I obviously fucking don't!” Jordan shouted, more at themselves. 

“Are you hungry? Have you-” Marie tried to ask, but Jordan cut her off. 

“I'm fine, Marie! I'm fucking fine! You don't have to worry about that shit.” Jordan said, defensively. 

“Well you don't seem fucking fine, Jordan. What did we say about communicat-” 

“I am fine, Marie, okay? I'm just fucking tired from everything. I thought this would help, but obviously not.” Jordan tried, hoping Marie would buy the explanation. Before Marie could respond, Jordan decided to just completely backpedal from the situation, they needed to get some distance between them right now, especially with just how fucking hungry they were right now. “I'm just gonna go. We can talk tomorrow.” 

Marie was already shaking her head as she spoke, “No, Jordan, wait-” but before she could finish, Jordan had sped off, leaving her standing alone by the trees. 

Jordan had sped back into the woods, just far enough to be out of Marie's line of sight. They couldn't help but look back at her, confused and upset at Jordan's sudden disappearance. But they didn't have a choice, they needed to get the fuck out of their and just lock themselves in their dorm till they could go safely find Justine again. Jordan took a deep breath, turning around, and walking their way back to Godolkin. They had only taken a couple steps before a sound to their right caught their attention. They turned, only to catch the sight of someone leaning against a tree, seemingly groaning in pain. 

“Hello? Are you alright?” Jordan asked as they slowly approached, only to stop dead in their tracks once they realized who this was. There Jordan stood, face to face with the blonde asshole who tried to grab Marie earlier. They were surprised to see their nose was still actively bleeding, the words coming out of the guys mouth not even registering. Jordan could help but step closer to him, making him back up more into the tree. 

“Aw fuck man, look- I-I’m sorry, okay? I didn't mean to-” 

“Shut the fuck up.” Jordan said, looking into the guy's eyes. But to Jordan's slight surprise, he immediately stopped talking. In fact, the guy looked as shocked as they did. But Jordan didn't have time to linger on that, the blood on guys face still drawing them in. The sound of their elevated pulse, pounding in their neck made Jordan's mouth water. The tiny voice in the back of their head tried to speak up, yell at them, beg them to stop, but they were too far gone now. It had been too long, they waited to fucking long. Their stomach ached with hunger, their skin crawling and begging for satiation. And here it was, right in front of them. Without thinking, they switched back to male form, grabbing the blonde by the shit, pinning him in place. The guy looked truly terrified, unable to yell out for help. The terror only grew as he watched the veins protrude beneath Jordan's now darkened eyes. Jordan felt the familiar ache in their teeth as their fangs grew out. At this point, Jordan could care less how terrified the man looked. All that mattered was the delicious substance that ran in the veins, just beneath the skin. Jordan, now mere centimeters from the man's neck, took a deep inhale through the nose, relishing in the intoxicating aroma of blood, and without a second thought, sunk their teeth right in, ripping through the skin and unleashing that which they crave. 

An animalistic growl escaped Jordan as they continued to feed on this man, sucking every last drop of blood he had to offer. The taste of fresh warm blood was almost incomparable to that of cold, bagged blood. It was invigorating, only urging them to drink more. They didn't stop, couldn't stop for a good few minutes, feeling the man's body go limp in their arms. A feeling they remember from the first time they did this. It was then that Jordan's conscience clawed its way back to yell at them. The images of that poor lady flashing through their mind, the possibility of them almost doing that to Marie. They screamed at themselves to stop, let go, maybe it wasn't too late, but it was. Because they couldn't stop. They kept drinking till there wasn't a drop left to drink. Only then did they manage to unclench their jaw and pull away, dropping the body on the forest floor. 

Jordan fell to their knees, staring at the dead body before them. They felt so relieved and rejuvenated, but at the same time terrified. Drinking the blood straight from the vein was a feeling unlike any other that left them with a clear head, but looking down at the dead eyes and limp body in front of them, with a clear, bloody bite mark on their neck, it fucking terrified them. It terrified them that they were the animal that did this, and even more so that they wanted nothing more than to do it again. Before Jordan could think anything else, a voice echoed out from beside them. 

“Well, took you long enough.” Justine tisked looking down at Jordan with a feigned apologetic look. “Aw, what's wrong? That conscience of yours making you feel bad?” 

The sound of Justine's voice alone ticked Jordan off, but her words were confusing them. “What the fuck-” but before Jordan could finish their sentence, they felt a sharp prick on their neck, a hand instinctively shooting up to feel where they've been pricked. They tried to turn around to see what the fuck that was, but it was too late. Their vision quickly became blurry, the darkness taking over, as they felt themselves fall, everything fading to black…

--

Thanks for reading this far! Hope you enjoyed. And honest big thanks to those that have interacted with every update, I appreciate it so much and it lets me know that people actually read these, lol. So yeah, until people don't, I plan to keep writing this. Actually have an idea for where I want this story to go, but if you have any suggestions or things you want to see, please let me know! I'm happy to do so. It might be a minute before the next chapter tbh. Life's getting hectic again and I'm in between jobs rn, so I won't have much time to write. But feel free to check out my other fic in the meantime (Never Be The Same), which drops every Saturday. Anyways, hope you have a nice day!

Much Love, 😎👍❤️

-PB

[that-left-turn]

Please, I beg you, please stop posting any anons that try to invalidate Carol, Mel, Caryl or the fandom. I'm on practically any platform. That anon is full of bullshit and tries to warm up allegations from years ago. That bullshit with not speaking out etc is as untrue as their newest claims.

Please, by posting these anons you're unfortunately dragging their bullshit on our accounts too.

Can't we just outright ignore them, please. We don't need that drama. And it's always the same anon jumping from one Caryl account to another every few days.

I really love your account and how you're always interacting with people but no matter how you explain something or not. These fans don't want to understand your standpoint. For them, all Carylers are bad. So please, let's just enjoy our fandom and leave drama out of our safe zone.

If you'll indulge me, I'll explain my reasons for engaging and then, we can see where that leaves us?

I'm aware that there are anons who don't reach out in good faith. (You should see some of the asks I don't post 🫣) I'm not gullible and my response isn't about convincing these anons or having a never-ending argument. I don't want drama. I want to reach the lurkers and the passersby. People who haven't given the workings of racism much thought, or who don't have ready access to this information or a cultural cheat sheet to decipher it. Not everyone lives in the US, and TV shows and movies are not a reliable reflection of real life good tools to understand how and why something's contentious.

A chunk of time ago, there was an incident where a Caryler wrote something racist and was called out (I believe by a Caryler of Color?), but it turned into "a whole thing" instead of just an apology and an amendment. The responses from other (white) Carylers in the wake of it made me so sad. They couldn't see the problem, which is why I wrote a post that provided historical background and cultural context. Because of anon asks, I later wrote some more posts on racism (in relation to TWDU and TV/film) and on general industry practices, including some of the problems with misogyny.

Regarding the ask you referenced, someone sent me screenshots of the mentioned tweet and it wasn't from years ago. It was in the last couple of days and those pictures were racist. I still think a part of the general problem—not speaking specifically about this tweet because it's on a different platform and I have no context for the poster or the discourse over there—is one of awareness, not rampant racism. Racists so seldom are the raging, frothing-at-the-mouth kind. It's usually that nice-lady-who-lives-around-the-corner type, who's kind to children and animals. She has some slight biases that you write off because she's a good person and does all these other nice things.

If you've never been a minority—always visible and seen—in your community and you've never had to deal with insidious bigotry on a personal level because your name signals that you belong to the dominant culture, your skin tone is light, you wear no outward signs that you're Other (like a hijab, yarmulke or dastār), and you don't speak with a foreign accent or in a dialect that's considered "lower class," then it's so easy to not notice what it's like for those who deal with that in their daily life.

The visible portion of the Caryl fandom is predominantly white, so it isn't a "safe zone" for POC when someone says/does something ill-advised, even if it's about a different part of the fandom. It's a reminder of real life and that you have to behave in a way that doesn't make white people uncomfortable. If you don't, then you're a troublemaker or the one who doesn't understand that "it's not that deep. Just get over it." Getting over systematically being treated as 'less than' by otherwise well-meaning people isn't a realistic expectation—look at Caryl and their invisible emotional scars that they struggle with—low self-esteem from reinforced institutionalized prejudice doesn't just "go away."

Everyone's bombarded with subliminal messaging from the time that we're children and we absorb these "truths" subconsciously, without reflecting on the validity because we don't notice that our views are being influenced. (It's like erosion.) Which is why it's possible to say casually racist/sexist things and not be aware that what you're saying is racist or sexist. You don't consciously think that people who're different from you for one reason or another aren't fully human, but the signal you send out by using language or imagery that's some form of -ist conveys that sentiment to the person who's impacted and also that it's okay to talk about someone else in that way.

My aim isn't to throw stones at anyone or bring cross-platform drama. I would prefer it if people stopped asking me to 'do something about someone who did something on a different platform' because I'm not part of the landscape over there and I have no relationship with those people that I can use as social capital to affect anyone's behavior. But, I've tried to highlight social injustices affecting TBOC and Caryl fandom so people can see the issues, even if they're not personally affected by them.

That's why I'm also talking about how things work in the industry. I see a lot of assumptions among fans, which is understandable since it's not a field most people come in contact with. I've tried to offer explanations of how a production functions and the ways in which female creatives are confronted with sexism and misogyny. I would like for the industry to change, but for that to happen, consumers need to know what they're buying into. AMC and TWDU in particular is not a place where women want to work because the misogyny is deeply entrenched.

That doesn't mean that I want to disparage, undermine or dismiss Carol, Melissa, Caryl or the fandom. I talk about the workplace inequality and the lack of narrative integrity because I care about these characters. I want Carol and Melissa to get their dues. I want canon for Caryl because that representation matters and it could help change what we see on other shows too. (Tiny creeks turn into mighty rivers.) It's about the aforementioned narrative integrity: Caryl's emotional arc has run throughout the course of the flagship show, even if it was arrested for a couple of seasons during the Saviors arc.

A TV show isn't produced to satisfy its EPs. It's supposed to make the studio money and the only way to do that is if there's a paying audience. You have to respect the viewers. Write for them. If you distill an ensemble show into a small spinoff focused on two characters, you need to tell a story that viewers who are invested in those two characters will tune in for. You shouldn't try to weed out the audience you have in order to attract the audience you want to write for. That's a poor financial decision.

Regardless, I'm not trying to stir up drama, I promise. I hope anyone reading my posts can see that I'm not combative, and I'm not posting the hateful asks or those that have nothing to do with TBOC. I try to offer a fair perspective regarding the direction of the show. I see red flags, but I try to elaborate on why in more practical terms than "this is how I feel about it." I hope that comes across to people 🫠

[crookedcherryblossoms]

Droplets- a love letter

(THIS CONTAINS POTENTIAL SPOILERS IF YOU INTEND TO READ THIS FIC SO BEWARE!!)

okay so I've been thinking about Droplets by @the-prophet-lemonade (Lucy) it's more than just a summer read. It's like we're getting into the raw emotional diary entries of this kid Jean right on the edge of adulthood. We're getting this really intimate look at what's going on inside his head, not just what's happening around him.

The thing that really jumps out at me right from the beginning is the pool. It's always there, looming large, almost like it's a character itself. You can tell it's not just someplace to cool off for Jean. It represents something. Something more. The way he reacts to it- "The water is cold, the way it laps against my ankle-bones literally the most disgusting thing I've ever felt" Intense much? Like it's just water. But for Jean, it clearly goes deeper. It's like the pool with its reflections and depths, which are like a metaphor for what's going on inside of him, and it's not always reflecting back something pretty. It reminds me of the feeling of when you're really drawn to something but it also kinda scares you a little. Like the hesitation right before you jump into the deep end. That push and pull is something I think we all grapple with, especially at that age when you're trying to figure yourself out. Who you are what you want. It's a lot. Speaking of complicated though, let's talk about Jean's parents for a bit. It's like whiplash, he's super affectionate with his mom one minute, even when he's frustrated. But with his dad, it's all tension. There's walking on eggshells. It's this unspoken baggage between them( despite us knowing whats really going on). It really makes you think about how families- especially our relationships with our parents, can shape how we interact with everyone else. Like are we ever really free of that need for approval? Especially from our dads- it's like no matter what you do it's never enough. Or maybe that's just me projecting. But I do think it's a pretty universal experience. That longing for validation from the people who are supposed to love us unconditionally. And when it's not there or we perceive it's not there it can really mess you up. Speaking of messing things up: enters Marco, the pool cleaner. Talk about shaking things up.

Marco just strolls in and upends Jean's whole world, he's so different from anyone else in Jean's life, so comfortable in his own skin. You can feel that energy, that difference is really unsettling Jean. in a good way though! Marco is this catalyst forcing Jean to confront those insecurities we were talking about. It's like the line where Jean says "He knows exactly where to dig to pull me out of the hole I've dug for myself over the years because I haven't yet learned how to drag myself out alone." Dang Jean! Tell us how you really feel. He sees something in Marco he wants, that strength, but he's also kinda terrified of it. (again- the hesitation before jumping) And of course, that's where the tension comes in. You can feel it practically radiating off the page. Those stolen glances, the awkward encounters. It's electric. And Lucy milks it for all its worth trust me. Just when you think it can't be more intense we get hit with the bombshell with Jean's dad! Don't even get me started on the dad., talk about a recipe for disaster- finding out your father has been unfaithful. Especially at that age when you're already questioning everything. and then feeling the need to keep this heavy secret hidden for the better of the family but it still all comes out, AND to discover it wasn't even actually hidden in the first place. Like, it's one minute Jean is trying to wrap his head around these new feelings for Marco, feelings he doesn't even know what to do with, and then his whole family falling apart. The internal struggle of feelings and the external family drama being paired together with the rest of the plot?? OOF. Jean has been craving honesty and connection and then his dad, and in a way his mom too, comes and BOOM. Blows up any chance at that, at least when it comes to his family. It's interesting how Lucy uses that to mirror what's going on with Jean internally. talk about identity crisis. Classic coming-of-age stuff. Your insides are a mess and suddenly the world outside decides to match! Like the universe is tryna tell you something. and the scene when Jean finds his mom crying in the kitchen?? my heart breaks for both of them. You can see those walls Jean has built up start to crumble- like he saw his own pain reflected back at him. It was a turning point for sure, he realized at that moment he can't keep hiding. Not if he wants to connect with anyone. Even his own mother. It's heartbreaking but also really powerful. Makes you think, about how even when families are messy when they disappoint us, they can still teach us so much about, I dunno, love and forgiveness, all that stuff. How our own experiences, especially with our parents, shapes what we think those things even are. Love and loyalty are different for everyone. You can feel that… that need for honesty, for something real, sort of bleeding over into how Jean acts with Marco. Seeing his mom break down almost gives him permission to be vulnerable in other parts of his life too. And we really see it with Marco, the way Jean starts to open up and lets his guard down- it's risky, sure! But also brave. Super brave. Letting someone see your flaws and all… that's what makes it real. That's when their connection becomes something more, something deeper. It makes you think about what real intimacy really is. Letting someone see past those walls we build up into the messy stuff we try to keep hidden. And that's scary to be seen like that, especially if you've been hurt before. But what Jean is figuring out is that the payoff can be HUGE.

And then Jean and his art. It's like his superpower- all those emotions, those desires that can't come to words he puts on the page. Like, Lucy is using those little sketches as like a metaphor, each one a little piece of Jean! And as he starts to share them you see him changing- growing even! The art is how he figures himself out. Makes sense of all that swirling around inside. Art can be powerful like that. Helps you understand yourself and when you share it you're sharing a part of yourself it's like that saying "Art is not what you see but what you make others see." In Jean, he's making us see a lot. About ourselves, about the world

So we've got this coming-of-age story, complicated family dynamics, a romance that sneaks up on you. But it's more than that- Droplets is like this deep dive into what it means to be human. The relationships, the vulnerability, that journey of figuring out who you are. This fic makes you think about the droplets in your own life, those little moments, those feelings you get, and the people you meet. They all fit together and make you who you are. To reference another saying "life is a journey, not a destination" Even when things get messy, even when it's hard. You can find beauty in the unexpected. In those little moments that make up life so pay attention to those droplets today. The small stuff, the big stuff. It all matters. Cause it's all part of YOUR story. That is the beauty of Droplets

[shinra-makonoid]

I think I also reblogged the times when I was corrected. I am, just like anyone, susceptible to being wrong and reblog wrong information. I am always open to getting them corrected and I did on many subjects. Being wrong doesn't mean I am complicit in anything, it just means I'm wrong. Biased by the people I follow, like everyone else. This isn't some agenda, and it's why I stopped reblogging any, because I realized that most of it was biased and I wasn't interested in checking more to find out.

Now, let's find out when and what I really reblogged during February:

The last post referencing Israel that I reblogged was from 5 days ago:

Does it sound pro Hamas to you?

Wait wait maybe the reblog before?

24th February:

Maybe the one before?

3rd february. I think I'm allowed to reblog news thing, and it's from one month ago, and it did happen.

And you have, as a bonus, 30th of January:

So the outwardly pro Palestinian reblog I've made is from a whole month ago, and there's no numbers. The one before is about Israeli bombing monuments (which, because of my work, I am sensitive to), which is also a news report.

(I excluded our debates that came after, because they are debates, not reblogs).

So on top of trying to prosecute me for some made up belief about my stance over a foreign issue, you reference things that happened probably at least 1 month ago, probably even last year. Do you think it's fair or reasonable to criticize me over something I haven't done for at least a month upon realizing my limitations regarding the subject? No it is not fair to do so.

Yes it is? I can only disagree with how you portray people out everytime you jump on them to call them antisemitic for no good reason (a bit like you're doing with me), if I say "I don't agree with Hamas" everytime, this is what you're expecting me to do, otherwise I'm antisemitic. Fuck that.

I do uphold my own stated morals. Do you have evidence that I didn't? You can't read my mind so it's gonna be difficult for you to prove. Reblogging pro Palestinian stuff is hardly evidence against that, no matter how much you stretch it.

So yeah, you're asking me to vocally condemn a specific group of people otherwise I'm a hypocrite and antisemitic. Pushing even more aren't we?

I oppose discrimination, but I'm also able to understand how TERFs get brainwashed, and while I don't agree with their positions, I would never want them dying, tortured or hurt. I don't "condemn" them, I don't like this word at all (and I had to check the definition to be sure I was really thinking right regarding its meaning), I don't think I've ever used it before you asked me to do so, and I'm not going to. I'd like to deconvert them. So what does that make me? I'm "clearly pro discrimination" because I don't "condemn" TERFs? I can be plagued with aaaall the horrible words you want by that logic.

Sure, IF you were doing it. I'm not. Just because I made mistakes last year and never argued specifically against antisemitic pro Gaza people, because I don't find any in my surroundings, doesn't mean much about my own positions regarding it. You're pushing for a black and white proclamation from me, this isn't gonna happen.

By the way, you didn't clearly disagree with the fact that Israel is killing people, do you clearly agree with killing people from Gaza if it's for Israel's defense? Even if you don't answer, what does that make you with your logic? Xenophobic? I thought you disliked discrimination too.

Oh well, I guess by your logic you're a hypocrite. See how dumb it is? This is the kind of faulty logic you're using. I am calling you on your bullshit, but you completely refuse to acknowledge it. I have been telling you the same thing over and over again on several posts now but you drown the fish and make sure to portray me as bad as possible for saying basic ass shit and having done mistakes last year. Look into a fucking mirror mate.

The thing I don't understand is when I say free Palestine, so many people think that means I hate the Israeli people. That I don't care if they die.

I care about the Israeli people.

I care about the Israeli hostages that were shot down by their own military.

I care about all Israeli hostages in general.

I care about the Israeli men being thrown in jail because they refuse to assist in the "war" around them.

I care about the Israeli people who don't support the genocide happening infront of their very eyes.

Even the Israeli people who do, I don't wish death upon them, or whatever hateful thing you think I do.

When I say free Palestine, I don't mean I hate the Israeli people.

When I say free Palestine, I mean Free Palestine

[bemylord]

ꜱ/ᴏ ʙᴇɪɴɢ ᴄʟɪɴɢʏ │ᴀᴘᴏʟᴏɢɪᴇꜱ

↳ characters: satoru, itadori, megumi, toji, nanamin, sukuna.

↳ warnings: it's fluff part, so there's no angst or hurtful things [some parts might be spicy].

↳ butler's remark: finally have dropped the last part of this angst theme.i don't know what kind of dr#gs i used when i was writing the last three.

↳ part one;

ɪᴛᴀᴅᴏʀɪ ʏᴜᴜᴊɪ:

he'd be very sad and angry at himself for screamed at you. he didn't mean to push you away because of his fatigue. as he recalled the phrase you dropped before leaving: 'i'm gonna cuddle with megumi-kun' this phrase goes on and on in his head as he runs into your room. he knocked first, hoping you're alone. he knocked again, but there's no response.

'my baby, i'm so-so-so sorry, baby.' he just jump to the bed, wrapping arms around your waist, pulling you closer to his body. 'no, don't cry because of me, i'm the worst boyfriend ever.' he kisses the top of your head.

yuuji will cry with you if you'd continue to sob your nose, burying your face as deep as it's possible in itadori's chest, unable to deny his necessity. he's comforting you in his arms, whispering praising phrases about you.

'i was a fool, y/n, please forgive me.'

'promise me you'll never scream at me like that.'

instead of words, but kissed your lips, nodded his head. yuuji will show his love and affection by kisses and hugs, holding you tight to keep you from running away.

'y/n, i love you.'

ꜰᴜꜱʜɪɢᴜʀᴏ ᴍᴇɢᴜᴍɪ:

you've decided not to leave but stay home, waiting as long as his malice calm down. you were waiting for him in the bedroom, still grieved by the last words. you know megumi wasn't serious - he hates being beaten up by todo or satoru, you also know that he'll be a puppy right after a bath.

he showed up in the room in the home shorts, aimlessly rubbing the back of the neck, breathing out what caught your attention.

'i shouldn't have let the anger gets the best of me, y/n.'

bruises and abrasions are coaxed on his upper body and face as it brings the pain when he sits on the bed. he again rubs the skin, nervous to ask you to heal him.

'i-i would like..'

'i'll heal you, 'gumi.'

he smiles, seeing you tenderly how you treat wounds. he thought you were going to kill him after the acuteness, but here you are, helping your lover.

'i don't deserve you y/n, you always have been so kind to me. i'm sorry for being a moron, my angel, i didn't mean it.'

you took him of guard by a quick, yet lovely kiss on the lips.

'i will make it up to you, i will change.'

ꜰᴜꜱʜɪɢᴜʀᴏ ᴛᴏᴊɪ:

you may think it'll take days or weeks for him to the realization of what did he do. you were a naive one by leaving the gold wedding ring on the table, thought he won't notice.

'i am not a servant or errand girl, i'm his wife!'

perhaps, you thought he won't sniff as you're leaving the house, silly. he has a perfect hearing to hear where you're going and what you left.

'what a jerk i fell in love for, had the misfortune to marry that...'

'to marry that?'

he finished your sentences, turning your body by your arm.

'need a woman to meet your needs, toji? i've had enough.'

his strong arm didn't let you a chance to leave the place you stand, only pulling you by the chin to look into the loving eyes.

'fool, you're my woman, my wife, and the mother of my future children.'

'regret?' he gasped into your lips before kissing them, nibbling lightly on your lower lip.

'i'll do anything to make you forgive me. should i ea-?'

'home, toji, home!'

'by the way, if you ever take the ring off, ohh. doll~'

ꜱᴀᴛᴏʀᴜ ɢᴏᴊᴏᴜ: [i think i was h1gh, no hate on me after]

i heard about the woman that have called her boyfriend about thosand or more times, so.. it's satoru. satoru has been calling you since you've left the house, maybe, you'd pick up the phone if you weren't be fury at your boyfriend.

you were walking in the park where gojo first confessed his love. your first kiss and something more than a kiss. that place you will always remember is the tallest and oldest tree in the park. noticeable and stately. as you came to the tree you heard someone behind you.

'you knew it's my place, y/n!' what? is that a touchy voice?

'whatever i'm leaving.'

'where do ya goinnng~~'

'home.'

'fine, i'm walking home too. take you home?'

'we live in the same house.'

'that's better! wanna watch netflix and chill?'

i'd say you're mad at him, but i'll lie. he's so funny and cute, how can you resist?

'don't act like a clingy, gojo.'

'you began first. ok-ok, i'm sorry, i'm sorry, i'm sorry.'

you had to gag him with a kiss because he would have continued talking nonsense. acting like a child. he lifted you by the waist, kissing you and whispering sweet phrases.

'i love when you're clingy, my baby, i was- i feel so bad due to the work, my angel. soon we'll be going on the mission.'

he lowered you to the ground, kissing you on the tip of your nose.

'let's pick some flowers and make a wreath, shall we?'

'we'll get arrested.'

'you can run, y/n.'

ɴᴀɴᴀᴍɪ ᴋᴇɴᴛᴏ:

you were taking a bath on your own, drowning in the tears - as you've mentioned you're overly clingy and vulnerable and nanami had had known this. he knew you could be sticky when you haven't seen him in a few hours - but does it badly? he knocked twice on the door, waiting for your response.

'darling, mm-' he hesitated as if you'll reject him. 'may i come in?' you only made a quiet mumbling sound, but it was enough for him to enter the bathtub.

he took off his suit, joining you. no matter how much you try, he will see your weeping eyes.

'i shouldn't have yelled at you over a hard day. darling, come to me, tell me how your day went.'

'not before you tell me about yours.'

you sat on his lap, massaging his sturdy, tired shoulders, helping him relax.

'taking a bath like that with you after a day's work is what i like best.'

he kisses your lips as your palms still find themselves on his shoulders. anyway, nanami doesn't want his future wife to cry over him - he'll be the best husband.

ʀʏᴏᴍᴇɴ ꜱᴜᴋᴜɴᴀ:

it has been weeks since you didn't interact with the king: neither you didn't come to his domain nor answer on his questions. when his sudden mouth appeared on yuuji's cheek, asking you to immediately come to his domain, you didn't feel the need to respond sukuna, irritating him.

you were waiting 'till the king will utterly be pissed off by your behavior, taking the possession of the vessel body to finally have a conversation with you.

'y/n, do something! sukuna has been so furious that i can hardly restrain him.'

'the king wants to see the stupid girl?' you crossed arms over the chest, letting out a sigh of relief - finally. 'i'm coming, sukuna.' you touches yuuji's chest to find yourself being instantly on sukuna's lap.

'you've been ignoring me for weeks, woman.'

'i wonder why? because i'm stupid and clingy?'

sukuna pulled the loose strands of hair out of your face carefully, so as not to hurt you with a claw. he cups your cheeks, making you stare directly at him in the eyes.

'i won't say it twice, so hear me out.' he kissed your lips with fondness, which was not characteristic of him. 'i'm sorry, okay?'

from now on, you can show off that the king of curses said sorry to you. be proud of yourself, 'till his eyes are cast dark hue, palms found themselves on your hips.

'i've been alone for days and days, y/n,' you could feel something raising underneath you. 'and why through all bastards you've chosen satoru?'

someone is jealous..

however, i have a feeling that there will be some sort of sequel...

tag my cuties <3

@monisi @herhappyplace @h3artfiilia @din0plushie @giaduuh @schleepyflocci @creammy0 @rmjace @whogonprayformee @wwholesome-vibes @blacckkwiddow @sivaneeee @deepcowboywerewolf @royaltyofwinterfell @bakugo1819 @electroniclightjudgeghost @alexganes @tonks221 @spn-obession @superbheropeachtrash @strwbrry-lia @sterieshinso @daynada @butyfigers @lonely-dreamer @adorenoya @fluffymarshmellowcat @cloudsinthecosmos @itsonyxpected @itspastellemons @kingdomblvck @lovliecs @doodledee-png @neo-lucien @fl4mepillar @musichime07

↳ back to the main master list.

[kaashiboo]

haikyuu boys reacting to you talking to an attractive guy part. 1

┇ akaashi and shirabu

→ fluff

【warnings: swearing】

gn! reader

✎ a/n: i got a bit carried away with shirabu's AAAAHHH. it makes me sad because im a huge shirabu simp but im content deprived so pls expect me to write more about shirabu for an unhealthy amount of times!<3

part 2 - coming soon (ft. tendou and iwaizumi)

akaashi

"y/n." he said, almost as if he was whispering but he didn't want to bother you as you seem interested in the conversation that you were having with your male classmate.

"darling." he tried once again, tugging on the hem of his your jacket. fortunately, you turned to him this time.

"i thought we were going to the newly opened coffee shop." he reminded you.

"oh yeah! okay, wait a sec." you smiled at him and returned your attention back to your classmate.

'ouch' he thought.

the seconds you promised turned into another ten minutes and so he was just standing there behind you awkwardly. he wasn't even paying attention to the conversation, he was just busy watching as your eye lit up in excitement. the way you would make weird gestures with your hands to furthermore elaborate your story. he noticed as well how attentive you look as the boy speaks, you leaning in to hear him better. heck, you didn't even bother to cover your mouth as you laugh— not that he hated it but you were never like that to him.

he blinks, starting to feel uneasy and having the urge to pull you out of the scene but he knows very well that you're not his property and that he has no right to tell you who and who not to talk to. as long as you're safe then he's fine with it.

he tries reassuring himself that your classmate was nothing more than just a friend but his insecurities were starting to slowly get into his head. he looks down to his feet, brows furrowed as an attempt to distract himself from his thoughts.

"keiji?" you spoke softly, placing your hand on his shoulder. he looked up, staring right behind you but your classmate was no longer there.

'how long was i spacing out?'

"are you okay?" you asked. taking out your handkerchief from your pocket to wipe the beads of sweat that were on his forehead.

"do you feel sick? we could always go to the shop next time."

"i'm fine." he curtly replied. he panicked as soon as he realized how rude his response was but he immediately relaxed when he saw you smiling gently at him.

"if you say so." you reached for his hand, and intertwined your fingers together as he lets you lead the way.

the short walk from your school to the cafe was quiet— quieter than usual. you told him to find a seat and offered to order for the both of you.

he wanted to protest and tell you that he could have paid for it but he chose not to. he really did want to talk but the unsettling feeling hasn't disappeared yet which made him want to not say anything at all.

you quickly found akaashi and sat across him. his hands were clasped together, resting on the table and so you placed your hands on top of his. giving it a light squeeze.

"you've been awfully quiet. do you want to talk about it?" he contemplated on whether he should tell you about his weird feelings or not but he decided that it would be better if he opened up.

"earlier," he paused, not really knowing how he should start it. if you weren't close to him then you probably wouldn't have heard that he spoke. you decided to let your hands on the table instead of his hands.

"when you were with your classmate, i was glad to see how happy you looked as you talked to him but it felt weird, i don't know why but the way you acted around him was completely different compared to when you're with me... " his voice shrunk.

"i apologize for thinking like this, y/n. i know it's completely immature of me. let's just— forget about it." he slightly frowned, grabbing his own drink and took a sip from it.

"were you perhaps... jealous, my love?" you chuckled and he playfully rolled his eyes at you.

"it's nothing, darling." he denies.

"it's clearly something, keiji. and besides, what you felt— or i assume, what you're currently feeling, is valid. i should be the one apologizing, okay? i'm glad you opened up to me." you reach for your drink next to his but akaashi was quick enough to get a hold of your wrists with his one hand effortlessly while the other grabbed your drink , the straw near your mouth. you looked at him in confusion.

"just drink it. i don't want to let go." he lets out a slight scoff, staring away from your teasing looks. you obliged before he changes his mind and take away your drink.

he still hasn't let go and you chuckled at how stubborn he was. he knew he could have let you use your other to hand to grab your drink but oh well.

"but seriously, keiji. you probably weren't listening but we were talking about something else." he doesn't know how your statement was supposed to make him feel better but he nodded, urging you to continue.

"i'm not gonna tell you to stop being jealous because i think that's easier said than done but i just want to assure you. we were talking about how his date went because he has a crush on my best friend and they finally went out. he doesn't like me and i don't like him in that way either." you explained calmly.

"and i'm sorry for making you think that i'm not comfortable around you. i think you took it the other way around though. just because you see me more hyper when i'm with others, doesn't mean i don't feel at ease when i'm with you. you make me feel safe and normal." you sheepishly confessed.

"oh." he mumbled.

"'oh'? that's all you're gonna say?" you joked, your gaze diverting on the table where he was still busy playing with your hands.

"sorry for jumping into conclusions."

"it's alright. i love you, remember that."

"i love you more, y/n."

shirabu

"goshiki. have you seen y/n?" shirabu asked as soon as he approached goshiki's table.

"huh? why are you asking me that? aren't we from different classes and year?" he tilted his head, confused with shirabu's visible frown.

"yea— i know that, shut up. you know what— never mind." he groaned and left.

break time is almost over and you still haven't shown up. shirabu may never admit but he truly is worried about you.

he stormed to the classroom of your previous class, silently opening the door, and peeked inside. only to see you sitting on your chair with your male classmate standing in front of your desk, a hand resting on the table to support his upper body as he leans down to meet your face.

he scoffs loudly, your head immediately turning to his direction, and leaned away from the boy.

"this is a school. not a motel." shirabu snarled.

"why are you here?" you raised a brow at him while your male classmate stood up straight, fixing his uniform along.

"i— i wanted to check something here but i was not expecting two irresponsible students deciding to flirt in a classroom. have you ever heard of good manners?" he crossed his arms on his chest. watching as you harshly shove your belongings into your bag before making your way to where he was.

you stood in front of him. having to look up a bit to match his piercing gaze, "you're smart but you're bad at making assumptions." you placed your hand on his chest and pushed him to the side to make way for yourself.

"where do you think you're going?" he shouted, trailing behind you as you try your best to get past the crowd.

"i don't know what the hell is your problem with me, shirabu. would you please mind your own business? what are you? my significant other? asshole." you rolled your eyes and continued your journey to wherever your feet decide to lead you as long as he would not be near you.

you looked over your shoulders. seeing that he already stopped following you. you were supposed to feel glad about it but you felt otherwise.

-

it has been exactly four days. four days without your usual bickerings with shirabu. the whole volleyball team was surprised. it's not like you stopped visiting them to watch their practice, but your interactions with the setter have drastically decreased. no one dared to ask about it and they all act like nothing is happening but the tension still somehow got in the way as you converse with the others. the pair of eyes carefully watching your every move and it took you all the energy to not look back.

'seriously? who does he think he is? it's so annoying. how dare he jump to conclusions. and besides, even if he was right, why does it matter to him so much.' you tried to convince yourself but it wasn't enough to overpower how you actually felt about the whole ignoring situation. you did try to approach him the other day but backed out.

semi noticed that you were spacing out the whole time as he was talking about something. not even the blow of the whistle was enough for you to snap back to reality and so he just patted your back before running back to the court to continue the practice.

you sighed to yourself and felt your phone buzz, receiving a text from haru.

haru: hey y/n! i'm in the library right now. i'll be waiting.

you wanted to bid your goodbye to them but they were too engrossed with practice so you decided to just leave without uttering a single word.

"shirabu! where are you going?" tendou watched as his teammate's figure disappeared from his sight.

"ah, young love." he clicked his tongue in amusement.

"hi haru!" you greeted and he offered a smile before he put his index finger to his mouth, a friendly reminder that you two are in the library. you whispered an apology before sitting beside him.

"so, how'd you do in the exam?" he starts.

"i don't think i'm very satisfied with it but i got a 90% so i guess it's not that bad." you talked as you took out your own textbooks and placed the test results on the table for him to see.

he gasps jokingly, "i beg to disagree that it's not a good grade. i literally got an 88%" he playfully punched your shoulders and proceeded to tell you how proud he was that you managed to ace the exam with his help.

"i hope you don't mind if we settle here instead? i didn't really want to bother my roommate and i think most classrooms are occupied right now." he looks at you apologetically.

"don't sweat about it." you reassured, placing your hand over his that was on the table but you immediately retracted your hand when you heard someone cough.

"what do you want?" you tried to sound tough but you were intimidated by his dark gaze even though he didn't mean to scare YOU off.

"let's talk." he looks straight into your eyes.

"no."

"oh? i wasn't asking. i was demanding." he then grabbed all your belongings, carefully but hurriedly putting them inside your bag and zipping it close, and slung it on his shoulder.

"shira—"

"kenjirō." he cut you off and impatiently grabbed your wrist, not forgetting to give haru one last glare before dragging you along to wherever he planned on taking you.

his pace was fast and you tried your best to keep up with him, being careful in order to not trip.

he abruptly stopped on his tracks which took you by surprise and almost hit your face on his back. he gently pushed you inside the volleyball team's clubroom and you finally gave in and decided to let him.

none of you spoke as you got inside. you leaned on the wall just beside the door. staring intently at your bag that he placed on the floor. having no intentions of making eye contact with him.

however, you didn't expect it when he suddenly stepped closer and nuzzled his face into your neck. "k-kenjirō?" you stammer, reluctantly hugging him and rubbing circles on his back for comfort.

"is there something wrong?" you whispered and he finally pulled away from the hug.

"sorry."

"kenji—"

"shut up," wow okay.

"i'm sorry for... being mean— not that it's something new but i didn't realize how bad it was to accuse you of something that you may or may not do... but that's not the point. i know you're bad at flirti—"

"kenjirō, are you apologizing or insulting me?" you let out a laugh. oh how he missed hearing that.

"right. anyway, i'm sorry i made you upset to the point that you had to avoid me," he was about to continue but you interrupted him.

"avoid you— what?! i thought YOU were avoiding me so i didn't want to bother you!" you exclaimed and the two of you stared at each other in confusion.

"so you weren't mad at me?" he narrowed his eyes at you, a hint of doubt laced within his voice.

"no? i mean, i was pretty upset that you thought i had the time to flirt with someone but it wasn't a big deal and my anger only lasted for an hour." you tried to elaborate.

"but why didn't you approach me the day after? heck, you didn't even spare a glance at me during practice!"

"because i thought you were mad at me!" you exasperated, massaging your temples at the same time.

"god, y/n. so you're telling me i avoided you for nothing?" you hesitantly nodded at him, mind still filled with questions.

"why were you so affected by it anyway," you mumbled.

"excuse me?" he raised a brow, sounding as offended as ever.

"imagine seeing the person you like to be with another attractive guy and be PHYSICALLY close with him. how would you feel then?" you were taken aback by his sudden confession but you decided to play along with his i'm-still-in-denial-game.

"well, i don't know about that because the person i like is constantly surrounded by handsome guys on the volleyball team but i was never jealous."

"so you like someone from the team," he humorlessly chuckled. "this is pointless." he stated.

you groaned at how slow he was, "you're so stupid. it's you who i like, kenjirō! oh my god i can't believe you're this dumb." he stared at you in disbelief, using his index finger to point at himself, "me?"

"no. the fucking wall, kenjirō. i like the wall!" you shut your eyes closed, trying not to get your annoyance into your head.

"then who were you wi—"

"a friend, shirabu kenjirō. haru is a friend who offered to tutor me for the whole week since exams are coming." you reassure.

"but why him? do i look like someone who won't tutor you?"

"yes..." your voice trailed off and he stood there, dumbfounded with how straightforward you were.

"but if you just admit that you were jealous then maybe i'd approach you instead." you joked.

"i wasn't jealous but you're changing your tutor whether you like it or not. now, come on and let's tell him so i could finally go back to practice." he picked up your bag and tossed it to you.

"you're not gonna ask me out first?" you teased before placing your hand at the doorknob.

"well then, go out with me."

"i said ask, not demand." you rolled your eyes.

"as if you'd have a choice anyway."

[wemakeitupaswego]

My current stance on Cockles is that they're not in a relationship, but Jensen has a huge crush on Misha that he may or may not admit to himself. Misha, on the other hand, being the agent of chaos that he is, loves to drop hints and tease and play with people's ideas about the relationship, and I think loves Jensen platonically and recognizes his beauty, but actually isn't into him romantically? And Jensen is too deep in the closet to admit that he does see Misha that way. Thus we get the constant flirting, and dynamic they have where they do have amazing chemistry and this deep, sweet friendship. I don't think it goes beyond that but...it could, it so could, if only things shifted a little bit

Hey anon. Initially my thoughts were exactly what you just said. I always thought they have a thing for each other that they are not ready to accept to themselves and each other. Sometimes we do deny our feelings to save what we have with the other person right?

But my doubts cleared when I actually saw them interact. The thing is anon when you don't act on those feelings there's always a little awkwardness there with intensity. When you touch them, where to touch, is it too much if I stare at their eyes, is it too much to be closer.... there's a matter of boundary issues due to the fact that you haven't acted on your emotions and you have a lot of them piled up.

Early Jenmish gave me those vibes. The initial awkwardness before you start any intimacy. But after a certain number of years that isn't the case now. It's the familiarity that they give out now. They are not backing down from touching each other, looking at each other... and if I were them and fans were referring to a relationship between us in public, I would be really uncomfortable with having unsolved feelings for that person. But they actually joke about it, initiate talks about it and aren't afraid to hint here and there. Either they're really comfortable or well....they're good actors.

I get the whole Jensen being deep in the closet thing. Bcoz that actually could be something that happened even if he understood his feelings towards Misha. I think at the end of the day, Jenmish living together in Vancouver, Ackles being close to Collins, the unpublished boy trips, Collins being poly, the straddlegate, the stroke kit drama and most importantly Destiel being cockles fault kinda rings to me like they have worked things out with each other. That chemistry doesn't work for 11 years if you have feelings bubbling up. You're bound to explode if u keep having to hide yourself like that one way or another. And they are most relaxed when they are with each other. It gives out very old married vibes now rather than awkwardness.

Besides I guess at one point someone could have jumped the shark but who knows...

[thedreadvampy]

I had a really nice therapy session where my therapist ended the season by saying 'I'm so happy for you I'm so happy I would really like to hug you if that's ok' and then we both had a little cry

because like. and this isn't actually about the New Squeeze except tangentially but the fact that they've shown me what. a healthy new relationship can look like. which I haven't had before partly bc I have never started a relationship at a time and place where I'm like. capable of accepting love and care or holding boundaries. partly bc when I started in my current relationships we were all hot messes so idk I guess I'd got as far as 'equal and respectful relationships are possible' but the last few weeks have shown me that I don't have to append 'after several years of hard work on both sides.'

and like. it doesn't feel fragile. I don't think this happiness is dependent on them because it's not really about them. it's about me realising that the ways I've been hurt weren't inevitable and weren't my fault. like I said to my therapist they could say tomorrow 'this sucks I have lost interest bye' and I'd for sure be UPSET but I don't think it would undo what the act of being shown care and consideration from the off has done.

like since I started seeing this person a month ago I have had 3 conversations I've put off for literally years. I've understood so much more about myself too. I've been facing stuff I didn't think I'd get to for years. because something about being treated as if it's obvious that my needs matter by someone who has no like. Investment in me. has made me realise how low my bar has been set. and that's let me set aside a lot of guilt and shame and worry and say 'hey. fuck that. I did not do anything wrong. my desires didn't cause this harm other people's bad actions did. this thing wasn't kindness and that thing was actively horrifying.'

and from that position I can talk about stuff!!!! and think about stuff!!!!!!!! without getting bogged down in 'oh no am I the baddie'!!!!!!!!

and I can also. just enjoy wanting things. I am getting in touch with my sexuality in a much less burdened way than I think I ever have. I am asking for things and setting boundaries. not just with them but with all my partners and family and friends. it isn't perfect but I legitimately feel like. safe. engaging with my shit from where I'm standing now.

and they are really nice but it isn't that they're nicer than anyone else close to me or that I like them better or that they're in some way more important. it's just kinda. the piece of the puzzle I needed just now. to have a new relationship that is genuinely just. nice. not an intense emotional rollercoaster or a constant worry or fear. and not something I've spent years very carefully and nervously building. just proof that someone can come into your life and you can be vulnerable to them and it's ok and nothing is on fire and your feelings are held as significant in the interaction. that's wild to me I needed to see it in action to really make the jump.

[sarah-sandwich]

what's a scene u edited a lot that felt less like battling a creature and more like planting a garden? <3

I love you for asking <333

All of the ones that immediately come to mind are from Lemon Boy because I'm editing it right now but I've shared so much of that fic I'm scared to share more until it's up lol

BUT the scene where Peter and Harley finally freaking talk to each other is going the garden route. I wrote it out of order, way before the story actually got to that point so it doesn't quite mesh up with the scenes before and after and their interaction is totally off.

My notes call it "confusing, melodramatic, and weepy" so you can imagine what kind of work I have ahead of me lmao but I'm going to transplant it into a cozy indoor pot, give it a good watering, and prune up the wilted bits. Then it'll flourish.

For a published example I'm going to go with the entirety of the first chapter of Paradise (spread out with a butter knife). I babied it to life and then babied it some more until I couldn't baby it any longer and posted it even though I hadn't finished the fic yet and I very rarely do that.

Idk if you like spideypool at all?? I'm very bad at keeping track lol but it's a really fun fic if you haven't read it! Rave reviews. Stupid humor and LOLs abound. Turns non-spideypool shippers into spideypool shippers. All my friends say so.

Excerpt below the cut if you need some convincing?

Deadpool sits up and a heap of hamburger wrappers cascade off his chest. “I know a job you could do.”

“Being your sugar baby isn’t a job, ‘Pool.”

“No, not that. A real job at uh, Pym… whatever it is.”

Peter sits up. “Pym? As in Pym Particles? As in, Hank Pym? The scientist? The research lab? That Pym?”

Deadpool snaps his fingers and points a finger gun at his chest. “That’s the one! I happen to know they’ve got an opening in R&D. Or they will soon. You made your tech right? I bet you’d fit right—,”

Peter jumps to his feet as his heart jumps into his throat. “What the fuck? Are you taking out a hit on one of Pym’s scientists?”

“Nooo,” Deadpool says unconvincingly.

“Dude!”

“I’m not. I just happened to catch wind that someone is.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“Listen, I looked her up. This lady is bad news. Like, experiments on puppies bad. She says shit like ‘All Lives Matter’ and—,”

“What does that have to do with anything?! We have to stop it!”

“We?”

“Yeah, we. You let it get this far, now you’re on the hook for saving this woman’s life. Come on.” He squats down and gestures impatiently at his back.

“Am I dreaming? A Spidey-back ride?”

“I will drop you in traffic if you say that again. Hurry up before I change my mind.”

Deadpool doesn’t waste another second before clambering up onto his back and wrapping his arms and legs around him.

“You’ll need to hold on tighter than that,” Peter says and then launches off the building.

Deadpool squeals in his ear and his grip turns suffocating as they plummet. Then Peter shoots a web and they swing up and away from the sidewalk. A breathless laugh ghosts past his ear and then Deadpool’s breath catches audibly as Peter releases the web and they begin to fall again. He thwips out another web and they begin another arc.

“WOOHOO!” Deadpool crows at the height of the arc, loud enough to make him flinch and to catch the attention of the people on the sidewalk below.

A reluctant smile tugs his lips. Yeah. Web swinging is pretty awesome. It’s kinda cool that someone gets it, even if it is Deadpool.

~*~

Peter flips back and pinwheels to the side to avoid the flurry of deadly looking laser beams. Red, violent, and wicked fast, it’s all he can do keep from getting hit while he’s the sole target of the beastly machine squatting in the corner of the lab.

“You said puppy experimentation! Not mad scientist bent on world domination!”

“I was starting with the worst offenses!” Deadpool snaps back, stabbing a katana into a bank of computers. They spark and the screens go black but the death lasers don’t stop. “You’re the one that wouldn’t let me finish! Besides, if you hadn’t webbed up poor Marty and had let him do his job, we wouldn’t be in this mess!”

“He was going to kill— Ugh! Whatever. For future reference, next time someone builds a Death-Ray-Inator that’s the first thing I wanna know about.”

“Noted.” With a grunt, Deadpool rips free his katana and sheaths it.

“Screw this!” He rips his pistol out of his thigh holster and aims it at the death ray.

“Wait—,”

He fires several times in rapid succession. The noise is deafening and the bullets ricochet around the room, rebounding off the metal-lined walls with deadly force.

Peter twirls, just barely avoiding a bullet to the abdomen as the heat of a laser skims past his nose.

“Dammit, Deadpool! That didn’t work the first time, why would you do it again?!”

“I got frustrated.” He holsters his gun, pouting through his mask.

“No more shooting! I have an idea.” He webs himself up onto the ceiling, shifts to the left just in time to avoid a laser to his back, and then scurries toward the far wall.

“What do I do?”

“Don’t move and don’t get hit.”

“Those are very contradictory instructions! What if I need to move to avoid getting hit? I don’t think you thought this through.”

He growls under his breath. Yeah he didn’t think this through alright. He should have left Deadpool on that rooftop and cleaned up this mess on his own.

“Just stay where I can find you!”

“Where you can find—,”

Only a few feet remain between him and the wall when his Spidey sense warns him to dodge. He leaps forward, avoids the deadly beam, and latches onto the electrical box hanging on the wall. Another flare from his Spidey sense has him dropping to the floor and throwing his arms over his head.

The laser beam collides with the electrical box.

Bang! The box explodes in a flare of green light and then the room goes dark. Hesitantly, he gets to his feet and breaths a sigh of relief.

“Uh, Webs?”

A laser fires from the Death-Ray-Inator, the red beam illuminating the white of the eyes on Deadpool’s mask before slamming into his chest and knocking him off his feet.

“Shit!” Peter stumbles over an overturned table, scrambling to get back across the pitch-black room where he left Deadpool. “‘Pool?”

“Still alive,” Deadpool wheezes. “Fuck, that smarts. Not much of a death ray though, huh?”

Continue reading on AO3

[nightswithkookmin]

RE JIKOOK IS ESTRANGED

Them

Me

Lol

JUMP CUT ALERT: This is a continuation of an ongoing discussion behind the scenes.

DISCLAIMERS:

Article 19, UN Universal Declaration of Human Rights: Every person has the right to freedom of opinion and expression which includes the freedom to hold an opinion without interference through any media.

Misinterpretation of my opinion, my words constitute a violation of my human rights. Please do not take my words out of context, share it on another platform in furtherance of your own agenda. If you do hold yourself accountable first. You are the author of your own intentions and interpretations.

I do not intend malice by my words nor do I seek to be disrespectful of any member mentioned in here. I simply enjoy mentally stimulating conversations and thought provoking discussions.

Let the records show.

MATTER OF THE DAY

Thanks to everyone that's shared your thoughts on this matter with me and thanks to that person that brought this matter to my attention.

I haven't looked into it and I don't know how severe this issue is.

I think people have the right to believe in anything they want to believe in. Personally, I don't think Santa is real but clearly others do, doesn't mean I'm sane or that they are crazy.

I don't think discussions of this nature should be about who is right or who is wrong. Everyone's opinion is valid and holds true to their own delusions. Lol.

Frankly, I prefer this kind of ship wars to the slurs and abuses and they are distributing hard core porn now?? What is going on! Chileee.

I have never believed JK and Tae to be anything more than friends. At one point, I wondered if they were even friends at all lol but since they admitted to having had a falling out themselves at one point the topic is now moot.

Tae and JK have- had- have a really special bond. To me anyways. I always saw them as the evil power twins of BTS due their ability to come together to wreck havoc especially on Bang PD's scripts. Lol. I think I have mentioned this a few times now.

I smiled to myself when I heard them call themselves partners in crime. The bond is there no two ways about it- you either appreciate it for what it is or you don't. personally I love their bond. Can't stand their shippers but I love their bond. They keep the drama going for me- love it. Lol

The question has always been whether their bond is as profound as their shippers make it seem. I argue it's not and I will always argue it is not. Lol

I think it's only fair that they also question whether Jikook's bond is as profound as we make it sound. I really can't be mad at that. All is fair in love and war- at the very least we can agree to disagree.

I mean even Jikookers themselves question the extent of JK and JM's bond. Some think they are just very special friends and nothing more. I think I talked about this in my is Jikook real post when I mentioned labels and the degree of love between JK and JM?

We know JK and JM have a unique bond. The question then is how far does that bond go. Is it just platonic, romantic or something in between?

This is the question I was aiming to answer with my is Jikook real post. My objective was to try and dismantle all the nuances that keep us from seeing the 'truth' about Jikook- that they are real. At least the way I see them.

I talked about unrealistic expectations we have of Jikook, false conditionings that often leads us to see Jikook as something more than they are- the amplified Jikook. We get used to highlight reels of Jikook's interactions in edits such that we feel there is something wrong with them when we see them in real time.

I mentioned that Jimin's nurturing nature often also estops people from reading more into his relationship with JK. He is nurturing of everyone, JK ain't special- they argue, just as this person is doing.

I talked about Jimin's Idol persona, the facade of the boy in love with JK- Jimin's role within BTS since debut and how that can equally blind us into thinking Jikook is something more or less than they really are. I have a post dedicated to this topic sitting in my drafts so I will not go into the details of it here. Please look forward to that.

But this person's post touches on another aspect of Jimin's personality that I feel is one of the things that often keeps us from seeing his relationship with JK for what it really is- his inclination for professionalism.

I keep saying this, several times now, that Jimin's Idol persona to me seems well developed, elaborate and very elusive.

I have mentioned a few times how I think during Jikook break ups that they keep it civil and professional for the sake of the team and that you might not even notice the difference especially if you place high value on their skinship.

The skinship would be there, the cordiality and civility would equally be there- except for moments when they are fighting, that gets bloody. Lol. They are best friends at the very least. It is why it's important to reevaluate the metrics we use to determine whether or not they are a couple.

I wish I could dialogue with this person to understand her assessment of Jikook and what she is using to determine whether or not Jikook are a couple and what makes her think Tae and JK are. Know what I mean?

What makes her think Jikook were a couple before 2017? What makes y'all think Jikook are a couple at all? I would like to hear from y'all- but come at me with the skinship bit and I'll block you deadass. Lol

So on this person's post, I think I agree with her assessment of JM's persona but I don't agree with the Jikook have been broken up since 2017. And I think I understand where this is coming from... I think some of us do. Yes they had a few fights that year especially leading up to Jimin's birthday- August was it? but we all know JK more than made up for it with the damn GCFs. Lol. kindly visit the timeline, peruse as many content as you can and form your own opinion on it. This is just mine.

Are Jikook Jikooking all the time? Absolutely not. They are human too. They fight, they make up, they break up they get back together, they have introverted, extroverted moments, they go up, they go down- have bad hair days, it's all part of their dynamics I'm afraid. From my point of view of course.

I feel some people notice these things too and when they sense Jikook aren't in a good place they bow out and Jump ship- I don't blame them. They are shippers not supporters. What Jikook need are supporters not shippers- or maybe both, do you.

Could this person be one such people? DNF shippers? Given up on Jikook before the end of their story? I don't know. May be.

Jikook is not a fantasy that you ship. It's a relationship that you support. You can't escape into them. They are an ongoing love story- chapters close, chapters open, you just have to ride it out till the very end.

I think the challenge of their post for me is whether or not Jikook is a performance. Her post leans into the whole Jikook is fanservice bull especially in light of the recent photoshoot video which some are using as evidence Jikook don't 'click' when the cameras are off- the lies they tell on Beyonce's internet!

I think I have speculated on this and shared my thoughts on this whole Jikook is fanservice bit. I will delve deeper into it in my next post on Jimin's idol persona but as I've already said, Jikook is fanservice is equally a misnomer.

Yes Jikook does fanservice sometimes, but they are not fanservice. Fanservice is the cover for their relationship. It's their glass ceiling- nothing to see here folks just two snakes under glass. Keep it pushing. (Sorry. Couldn't help myself. Lol)

But you do raise a valid question, what is Jikook like when the cameras are not filming?

Is the mood of Jikook in that footage the general mood of Jikook behind cameras as Tuktukkers are claiming? They barely interact, JM doesn't pay much attention to Kook, yadda yadda yadda?

And the part that gives me a complex, that JK only interacts with JM when they are the center of attention. Huh???????????

Sigh.

I feel caught between a rock and a hard place on this one.

The theory you pointed out in support of this assertion isn't mine and I think I made it clear I didn't share the same thoughts on it. I said it was valid nevertheless. Chilee, this is hard. Lol

Yes JK is an introvert, Jimin is an extrovert, JM doesn't live for JK, all that is true and some Jikookers have said that too- so when you ask, if this is who they are when the cameras are off does that mean what they do when the cameras turn on is fanservice-

I-👁👄👁

I don't know the thought process that went into that theory so I can't confidently defend it. I'll ask? Lol.

Personally, I'd like to know whether or not they see the tension in that footage as tension in the first place. Chileee I don't know.

I see it as tension. Not a very serious one though. So we'd have to agree to disagree on that one.

But the part I can argue, the part I agree with is Jikook aren't hyper super duper lovey dovey on each other all the time. They aren't cuddly all the time. They have their moments of quiet- Jimin seems like the more affectionate kind who'd rub all over JK in the comfort of their homes but still...

If you ask me though, I think Jikook are tamer on cameras than they are behind scenes. I always talk about the fear and panic in the members' eyes when they see Jikook gravitating towards each other- it's probably because they know the extent of Jikook's shenanigans. They know how worse it can be because they've seen it all.

And when JK panics sometimes when JM gets closer too you just know dude is scared perhaps because of his Mochi chick's devil may care shamelessly in love policies- Jimin wild. Bless him.

I did say also that Memories 2019 is equally eye opening. These were censored bits. BigHit was holding all of that and giving us crumbs- stingy mfs. Bless.

All that said, again I don't think Jikook are hyper lovey on eachother behind the scenes. Another part I diverge from that view is that this is not exactly off camera. It was just behind the scenes of a photoshoot. Something we've seen a countless times.

This is not BTS's first ever behind scenes photoshoot. It's just a different angle that's all.

They were working. They were at work. This wasn't an alone private space for them so they can't base on this to say Jikook don't interact when the cameras are off.

The cameras were rolling. We saw them interact, JM was interacting with everyone the way he always does on camera all the time except he wasn't interacting with JK the way he does all the time, grainy footage or not- I mean let's call a spade a spade and not a big fat spoon. Lol

As to why he was doing that- let's just say there are many schools of thoughts.

My thought as I've said is JM was freezing JK out. I think with anyone that's recognized and is familiar with Jikook fights, that mood is all too familiar as I mentioned earlier.

If JM was being courteous and not mad at his man then he would have kept it 'professional' and done the 'fanservice' bit with Jk as per usual just as this person is saying since the cameras were still rolling.

Jikook is not fanservice. They are real.

I have refrained from providing a detailed analysis of that '5 minutes' footage for reasons I will explain later when I do share my thoughts on that footage- eventually. Some day.

But my hypothesis remains the same that I think Jikook were fighting or had a minor issue. As to why they were fighting, chileee I don't know. The confirmation bias in me feel it had something to do with JM's birthday but honestly it could have been over anything at all- dumplings, microphones- we all saw that slap on stage, a certain Iphone notification perhaps, did JinMin make a secret VLive without Kook again? Lol

There are plethora of reasons, I can only speculate on a few. And I think we've all seen Jimin when he is not 'Jimining' with the others, JK included. Take his mood with Tae at GDA for example- since this is not a VMin post I won't go into it.

But it seems they squashed whatever beef they were having on stage when JM extended his hands to Tae and they shaked it out.

We've seen him and Suga bicker too- which again, I am not gonna to get into out of respect for their shippers but I can point you to the On comeback VLive early this year when Suga touched JM and JM mouthed Hajima to him- which I think had something to do with what was going on with him and JK at the time but that is besides the point. Every shipper for themselves.

I contrast his 'fights' with Suga and V to show you the difference between Jimin being professional and courteous and Jimin being rah rah. He was sat next to suga, talking and laughing with him but snapped the moment Suga held his back.

He did the same in the Dynamite MV Vlive, smiling and laughing with Suga but the moment JK teased him with the Yoonmin comment his countenance fell.

Jimin is not that good of an actor if you ask me. I have said he is very Kumbaya in nature, often makes compromises for the sake of the team but that don't mean he is a pushover or one to trifle with- he scares me when he is mad. Lmho.

The scene in that footage didn't look to me as that he was being nice and courteous to JK- is that y'all's definition of professional courtesy? Damn.

If they were having a lover's squabble then the 'icy' mood of Jikook we saw in that footage is not the general mood of Jikook when the camera's are turned off.

I have to state again that I don't know much of what goes on behind the cameras and most of the things we see sometimes are equally missing context.

That been said we have seen enough of Jikook 'behind cameras' and they are more intimate than we can imagine. A certain cozy selfie at the back of an abandoned truck comes to mind. Whatever they were doing at the back of the track wasn't intended for the cameras judging from JK's reaction.

We've had glimpses of Jikook when they are not the center of attention enough to have a fair idea of what they are when cameras are off and I don't think it is that mood we saw in that footage.

We saw them at Jingle ball bell, towards the end of 2019. We saw them in their own space doing what they do best- making us feel single as fuck. Bless them.

We've seen them at awards, we've seen JK eating Jimin's ear nom nom to calm him down- like I would have just bought him icecream to calm down his nerves or rubbed his back but whatever JK. He is your man; you know him best. Good for him. Good for both of you. Now come back and feed us.

And the bit about JK only laughing with JM when he noticed he was on the Bangtan Bomb cameras in that footage- now that's nasty below the belts phony ass ass! I felt that one straight in my chest, shit. Lol

Dude was in a doghouse it seemed and I noticed them stealing glances at each other and.... sigh.

I just think JK was looking for an opening to warm his way back into JM's good graces- it's really nothing we haven't seen before.... sigh.

This is 2020 that narrative of JK hates Jimin, JK doesn't like JM needs to stop. It's dead. Pack it up. Chileee, y'all tried it with this one.

Jk is nice to JM only when the cameras are on him? Nice try.

JK is so fake and fraudulent he glared RM down till he stepped away from Jimin- again, in the very same photoshoot footage y'all swear to God is proof Jikook is not real.

Find it. RM stood next to JM. Looks up see's something- or someone. Does his tell- the hand to head thingy he does when JK glares at him over Jimin. He backs away inches from JM.

Cut to JK. Dudes a mood. Jin bumps into him, stares at him but JK wouldn't even look at him and then deadass looks away grumpyly- talk of professionalism. You doing great swidy keep going!

You can hide a relationship, fake it on God but you can never hide the intimacy. Taekook just lack that intimacy, I'm sorry. Even in that 'estranged' moment Jikook's intimacy was still there-

Even in whatever mood JK was in- which again, I believe was just due to their lover's squabble- JK still was claiming his man and exercising his right of authority over him. That's how you know they are not broken up. In my opinion. Chileee. I'm gonna get in trouble. Deep sigh.

Y'all think JK was hovering over Jimin because he was preparing to strike him down like a censored censored censored? Yea, he was preparing to strike alright- All the corners of Jimin's heart. Y'all better stop before I find you. Lol

I said I wasn't going to analyze the footage in this post but damn. This man out here serving us all kinds of brooding assorted jeonlous as his man takes a time out or two to wiggle wiggle wiggle on him Malfroy style and y'all are out here peddling nonsense. Strike one.

He was a mood alright. Did y'all see Tae rubbing his chest, arms and legs, ears did y'all see any body else in there doing that for him? Y'all's falcon cannot hear his falconer give it up and sorry, Jikook can't relate.

As I've posited, JM I feel was mad as hell for whatever reason and wasn't in the space to be that person JK needed him to be- in that moment. Doesn't mean they are like that behind scenes all the time.

And before I get attacked again for causing drama, being toxic etc by Jikookers understand that I am just a delusional person shipping these two in a way that makes sense to me. Write me off as delulu, and go please.

Whatever ambiguity surrounds that moment, to me, Jin and RM's reaction to JK clarifies things a bit. Jikook were boiling hot. JK was still keeping an eye on his man. Lol. Bless them. That's my conclusion. I'm running miles with that. Catch me. Lol

Feel free to come up with your own theory in a way that makes sense to you.

I'm not sure how long that fight lasted but from the rain day incident I'm hoping it wasn't that long. Jikook are fine I believe- I hope. Judging from the way JM drew JK out in his VLive with the whole I miss JK comment? Did that not sound familiar to y'all? And that Mickey mouse thingy- JM ain't slick. Bless him.

JM is the perched akekeke whisperer whispering all kinds of things in JK's ear, feeding JK news of what goes on on social media and what not. Dude don told his man they won a BB on his birthday, told his man Jin wasn't happy he chose his bag over his- definitely told his man Army was missing him- what? I'm going with that too sue me. Lol

Did you or did you not see Jk coming out to do a live log afterwards? And JK seemed less grumpy, in very high spirits? Wedding bells- I'm manifesting it for JK. Manifest with me.

Remember when JM did a log and talked nonsense about JK, and JK did a rebuttal log to respond to JM and address some of the things JM had said about him? Remember that? It's a jikook thing and it's back😌

I have said JM uses social media to connect with Army while JK uses it as an outlet to express himself. Through out his Live he kept talking about how he wasn't prepared to do a live and it shows in the way he kept saying it was awkward, he just kept it business and didn't know what else to share... I wonder who put his paws on him, dragged his ass to turn on the camera because Armys had asked of him- a certain quick tempered chick who dragged his man out on social media to do the whole Chuseok greetings 2020 on Twitter perhaps?

And JK is so whipped he'd do just about all the hoops to appease his man- Jikook AU written by Goldy. High five. No but seriously...

Behind the scenes, JK sneaks into JM's bed at night- Taekook does it too? Please! The look on JM's face when RM spilled that tea is enough said.

There's only two people in BTS that panic and don't want us to know they lay one on God in bed and it's not Tae Kook.

JK: Jimin hyung and I will sleep here

JM: how about we let the others choose first

Everyone shares a room:

Footage:🦄🍲🐯🧀🐺🍟🐓🥛🐑🛏

JIKOOK share a room:

Footage: 🚪👀

Behind the cameras Jikook sneak into each others bed- camera caught them live. You saw JM's face, I can't make this shit up. Lol

Behind the scenes, Jikook do laundry at 1am. *insert JM pervy face meme.

Chileee, y'all making me trip with this one. Deep breaths.

Jikook have their moments. This was one of them. Can they be human? Please. Thank you.

At this point, these folks are not even shippers. They is shoppers shopping a man for their bias. Lol. Just admit y'all want Jeon thick thighs strong butt for your bias and go. Just admit you want some tall glass of Tiger charming face husky voice strong chest for your bunny and go. Lmho

Chilee, when we say Tae and Kook had a falling out we don't mean they freeze eachother out behind cameras. Hell, we don't even mean they fake their bond or interactions. C'mon! Tae and JK admitted they are not lovers and y'all is bitter. That's why y'all is making up this nonsense about Jikook. Speak the truth and shame the devil. Peter would be proud.

When we say Tae Kook is not real, We just mean JM spends JK's birthday with him while every one including Tae is out there cruising for Jesus with friends. We just mean Jikook claim eachother even when they beefing. That ship beefed and didn't even know they was beefing and they are real? Damn.

We just mean Jikook make efforts for each other even when they are having bad days- Had it not been for Jimin they'd still be gnashing on these cold streets. Place some respect on his name, y'all's ungrateful. Lol

Tae and JK don't want each other they both want Jimin- there. I said it.

Thanks for attending my Tedtalk. 👁👄👁

Now where was I? Never mind. I'm just gonna go burn some sage. There's too much negativity going on around. Hakuna matata!

There is nothing wrong with Taekook as a ship. Personally, I'm a multishipper I ship all the ships but I support Kookmin. I don't mind their shippers calling them whatever, but my eyes twitch when people who claim they support Jikook act wishy washy with Jikook. Lol. Like are you going to withdraw your support of Kookmin if JK sits on Tae's lap?👀 Yall make me nervous. How can you think Jikook is real but then look at Taekook and go huh??? What are y'all seeing that I can't see?

Like those are two completely different dynamics. It's the skinship isn't it? Talk to me. Jikookers who see something nonplatonic in Taekook honestly give me trust issues. Y'all have me out here looking over my shoulders.

I am delusional but I'm confident in my delusions because to me it is about the love and support for JM and JK as LGBTQ plus couples. Please stop shipping Jikook, stop shopping JK and JM for eachother and start supporting them because they are real.

IN MY OPINION.

Signed,

GOLDY

[mankai-onlyfans]

"Hey guys!" Kazunari bursts into the lounge, tablet in hand, and flashes everyone a grin. "Check this out!"

Sakyo looks up, his eye already twitching. "We're in the middle of a meeting, Miyoshi."

Kazu nods, his energy not diminished in the slightest from Sakyo's chilly demeanor. "Yeah, I know! That's why I-"

"Then please let us finish." Sakyo cuts him off, gesturing towards Izumi to continue.

She gives Kazunari an apologetic smile. "Like I was saying guys, we're facing a real problem here. With everyone in quarantine, we can't put on any shows for the time being. It's just not safe."

"And without selling tickets to performances," Sakyo adds. "Our profits will go through the floor."

Sakuya makes a noise of disbelief from where he sits on the couch beside his fellow company members. "What?! But does that mean-"

"All of our hard work, down the drain..." Tsumugi says somberly, his brows furrowed with concern.

Izumi nods. "We can't let this place go bankrupt after all we've done to save it. That's why we have to figure out a way to earn money while everyone is staying home." She looks around the room at the twenty actors, all under her guidance. "Any ideas?"

Kazunari waves his hand around in the air. "Ooh, I have a-!"

"Maybe we could livestream some performances from here." Tasuku suggests. "Like one act plays, people could buy virtual tickets."

"That's a good idea!" Izumi points at him and turns to write it down on the whiteboard.

"But how would we advertise? All we have is the company website." Sakyo points out.

"Oh true." Izumi slumps. "We can't do street acts like we normally would to promote."

"And that's how we garner new fans." Sakyo says. "I guarantee that we would only get a tenth of our usual audience, maximum, without proper promotion."

Izumi hesitantly scribbles down the idea.

"Guys-" Kazunari starts to say, but this time it's Omi who interrupts him.

"What if we record videos and upload them online? Like vlogs and things. They're pretty popular right now, and I could help with filming."

Sakyo shakes his head. "That won't be showcasing our talents as actors. We need something more marketable."

"Guys, what about-"

"I know!" Citron interupts Kazunari this time, and jumps up from his seat. "We could make stuffings of ourselves and sell them!"

"Stuffings?" Tenma looks appalled.

"I am NOT being taxidermied, okay?" Taichi whines, curling up and hugging his knees with a shudder.

"I think he means 'stuffies'. Like plush toys." Itaru chimes in, busy as always on his phone.

"Plush toys?" Muku asks, his eyes lighting up at the thought.

"Yes!" Citron exclaims. "One for each of us. Yuki could sew them! A little Citron, a little Itaru-" he points to himself, and Itaru in turn. "-and a little Muku!" He finishes, leaning over to pat the pink haired boy on the head. "Soft, squishy stuffings!"

"Marshmallows...?" Hisoka asks, only hearing half the conversation.

"Wha-?" Muku blushes, seemingly overwhelmed by the idea. "B-but who would want a plushie of a shrimpy, no-good, wannabe actor like me...?"

Misumi hugs him with a chuckle. "You're not shrimpy, you're fun sized!" He pulls a triangular pebble out of his hoodie pocket and hands it to Muku to comfort him.

Yuki scoffs in agreement. "And if anyone here is a no-good, wannabe actor, it's the hack." He sniffs, shooting a glare in Tenma's direction.

Tenma balks and is probably about to retort when Izumi claps her hands for their attention. "Plushies would be a great idea. But I'm not sure if our fanbase is big enough to want to buy that kind of merchandise."

Sakyo hums his agreement. "We would need to weigh the cost of production with potential sales revenue. But Izumi is right, without a strong enough following, the idea would be a waste of time and effort."

"GUYS!" Kazunari steps into the middle of the room, waving his arms around frantically.

Everyone looks to him, slowly falling silent. "What's up, Kazunari?" Izumi asks.

Kazu lets out a breath of relief, happy to finally have everyone's full attention. "I have the perfect solution!"

"Care to enlighten us?" Sakyo asks, crossing his arms and leaning back in his seat.

Kazu nods and whips out his tablet. "We need a way to make money, while still growing our fanbase and showcasing our talents, right?"

"That's the idea." Juza grunts.

"Say no more! I found this great website, where you can make an account and post exclusive content in exchange for moolah." He turns the tablet around and shows it to Sakyo, who adjusts his glasses to examine it. "They have multiple levels of subscriptions, so it's affordable for the casual fan, and super fans can pay more to get more content. Boom! Monthly income, and a way to grow our skills and fanbase."

Kazunari grins proudly at his little speech. Sakyo's brows lift slightly as he examines the price points. "This... might work. What's the name of this website?"

"Patreon." Itaru says, reaching for a sip of his soda.

"Nope! Onlyfans." Kazu replies.

Itaru promptly sprays soft drink all over the couch, as well as Tsuzuru and Banri.

"Ah, shit! Watch it, man..." Banri grumbles, while Tsuzuru wearily hands Itaru a tissue and claps him on the back while he tries to choke in a breath.

"Are you..." Itaru coughs, his eyes watering. "Are you sure that's the best idea?"

"Why wouldn't it be?" Kazu asks, perplexed.

"It's just that... people sometimes..." Itaru tries to stammer out what he means to say, uncharacteristically flustered.

"People use that site for all sorts of things." Azuma chimes in helpfully, his hands folded in his lap. "It's very profitable."

"Right? That's what I'm saying!" Kazunari shoots a finger gun and a wink at Azuma, thanking him for agreeing. "It's like, totally a great way to make money. And check it out, the content is exclusive to people who subscribe, so it builds hype and mystery around what's posted."

"Oh, it's no mystery." Azuma chuckles to himself, his eyes glittering with amusement.

"So, what do you say, Frooch?" Kazunari turns pleading eyes to Sakyo. "I'll manage all the networking for it, and I'm sure Itaroon wouldn't mind promoting it either, right dude? You have a bunch of followers!"

At this, Itaru's cheeks turn curiously pink. "I-I'm... people might think..."

Sakyo stands up. "Very well. Miyoshi, you can set up this Onlyfans promotional account for the company."

Kazunari fist pumps the air in victory. Sakyo points a finger at him. "However, I expect you to take this seriously, alright? If I don't see profits by the end of the month, I'm pulling the plug."

"You got it, chief!" Kazu cheers, giving him a salute. Then Sakyo glances at everyone else. "I expect you all to cooperate and do as Miyoshi tells you. He's in charge of this project, but we all have to participate for it to be successful. Remember, this is catered to our audience."

"I'm sure they'll be overjoyed," Azuma smiles cryptically.

Sakyo then adjourns the meeting and leaves, taking Izumi with him to talk about budgeting. The others all chatter over each other, bursting with questions about this new endeavour.

"Whoa, whoa! One at a time, guys." Kazu laughs, thrilled to be the center of attention.

Homare raises his hand. Kazunari gestures for him to go ahead.

"How frequently will we need to post? I require inspiration to make anything truly worthwhile." He chuckles, twirling his hand in the air dramatically. "I cannot create on demand, you know."

Kazunari snaps his fingers. "Cool question. Answer is: whenever you want! Subscribers will be paying the same fee no matter how much we post, but posting more often will get more people talking about us!"

Sakuya raises his hand next. "What kind of content should we make? There's a lot of options."

While considering Sakuya's question, Kazunari either ignores or doesn't hear Itaru choke again. "I'd say we should do lots of stuff! We can post vlogs, like Omimi suggested, and scripted stuff, like Tax's idea. It'll give us good practice and show off our skills."

"What about fanservice?" Azuma says innocently, raising his hand as he does so. "Wouldn't it help us grow closer with our fans if we take their questions and requests?"

"Fanservice! Yes." Kazu agrees.

Itaru purses his lips, his eyes full of alarm he stares down at the carpet.

"You know, that's a good idea." Tsuzuru says thoughtfully. "Even though our fanbase is growing, we haven't really interacting with them on a personal level."

"Trust me, this will make it super duper personal." Kazunari assures him eagerly. Itaru tries to hold in either a laugh or a sob, his lips beginning to twitch from the effort.

"Maybe we should look at some other accounts to get ideas." Masumi suggests.

"Great idea!" Kazunari agrees, lifting his tablet. But before he can search, Itaru and Azuma are both on their feet.

"Don't-!" Itaru snatches the tablet away. "I... I have to get my login bonus." He gives the weak excuse and quickly makes sure Kazunari hasn't accidentally called up any questionable content.

Azuma pats Kazunari on the back, smiling apologetically. "I think we should come up with something unique, without any influence..."

"Y-yeah, sure." Kazunari looks between them, his eyes wide with confusion.

Mankai Onlyfans, now open!

Do you love seeing shows at the Mankai Theater, but you're stuck at home? Never fear, now you can see exclusive Mankai content, right in the comfort of your bed! Tune in for exciting livestreams with extra special new shows just for you! Get to know our actors in thrilling and intimate ways like never before!

Send us your burning questions, your most desired requests, or just come to chat! Fanservice of your favorite actors** delivered right to you!

**Muku, Yuki, Masumi, Tenma, and Taichi are exempt from answering any questions or requests that their director deems too suggestive.

[mazerunnerrose]

Newt X Reader Part 2

Y/n is back and she is alive

That confused me even more. How do these people know who I am even though I have never met any of them in my life. Well that I remember.

The boy who told them to go get the guy named Newt jumped down into the box landing next to me. He crouched down to look me in the face and smiled "hey there greenie. It's nice to have you back."

I tried backing away confused and worried "how the hell do you know me? I have never met any of you in my life."

"The names Alby. And don't worry Y/n we won't hurt you. I'll tell you what we know later but we have to get you out of this box and show you around."

He stood up holding his hand down to me. I took it still holding Bandit as he pulled me up. The boys that were surrounding the box helped me out of the box and a young chubby boy probably about 12 or 13 ran up to me pulling me into a bone crushing hug.

I froze but soon relaxed as this position seemed very familiar to me. "y/n you're here. I thought you were dead."

"Chuck she doesn't remember anything." Alby said as he stood next to me. I turned to him and saw the sad look he was giving the younger boy.

The boy in which Alby called Chuck frowned and said "sorry greenie."

As I stood there dazed the name Chuck ran through my mind. Then a memory hit me.

"Chuck come on"

"y/n hold up. You're to fast for me."

"Well being fast pays off when your a runner."

"Wow,  greatest sister of the year award goes to you"

I finally stopped running turning around to laugh. "get over here!" I pulled him into a hug "well you aren't the best brother either" I sarcastically said.

"You have been spending to much time with Minho."

"of course I learned from the best. Speaking of which where is the Sarcasm Queen?"

A voice pulled me out of my trance and I looked down to see Chuck standing there. I pulled him into a hug "I missed you so much brother."

Chuck's eyes lit up as he hugged back.

Alby watched amazed that I remembered that again. "Do you remember everything?"

"Sorry I just remember Chuck and some guy named Minho."

Newts POV

I was sitting sadly in the garden caring for the plants. Today a new Greenie showed up but I couldn't bring myself to welcome them. It's has officially been 4 months since my girlfriend Y/n had went into that maze and never came back out. 

"Newt!"

"Newt!"

I turned around to see Gally screaming my name. "what is it?" I noticed his happy face. A face I haven't seen on him since Y/n never came back. Y/n and Gally were great friends. She would always make friends with everyone.

"Come quick. She is back! Our glader girl is back!"

My eyes lit up as I ran to the box cursing my Bloody limp.

I froze in disbelief as I saw the love of my life interact with her younger brother Chuck while carrying a little puppy. I couldn't believe it. She was alive.

Before I could run to her Alby caught my eye and shook his head. I nodded mine sadly. She doesn't remember. But I have to try. I will do anything get her back and I shall never let her get away again. No matter what.

@technolilly @baseballbitch116 @mazerunner @maze-runner-imagines @the-writer-appreciation-blog

[geek-gem]

Transformers Dark Of The Moon

I've finally seen the movie again after these years. Let me warn you, spoilers and I have a lot to say.

Their is really a lot to say about this movie. But I'm glad I finally got my to do list of watching the first three Bayformers now.

Another thing I'll be honest about I was gonna play the Dark Of The Moon game on PS3 but it requires more MB's to clear out but I decided fuck it I don't care. Especially it's a short game but I'm not doing that shit. I just wanna watch this film especially remembering this is a long film.

But back to the movie. I'll be honest and I'm not critic and my opinion may be invalid because lots of people hate Bayformers. We have a new continuity with the Bumblebee movie which I think is the best decision this franchise has done.

To me this movie while I like the first film from 2007.

After watching this and I'm still having some feelings after being it. But I feel this is my favorite out of the Bayformers saga. This is basically where it should of ended and should of let the Bayformers end with dignity. Or at least until a new director came along like Travis Knight or others.

Especially like I remember a movie guy named Cure4 on DeviantArt but he's gone from that shit. I agree with him and I'm thinking this is the sequel the 2007 film should of had.

I'm pissed and I hate that Age Of Extinction was the follow up to this film. Despite how people feel about this film, my God Bay tried to redeem himself after Revenge Of The Fallen a film that is like some sort of weird parody there the video game tie in's I see as the best version especially the PS3/Xbox 360/PC versions and even the Wii/PS2 versions.

Another thing I wanna reveal when I saw this film for the first time in theaters I actually used this.

I seriously wore that and it worked and it was awesome. It was a experience despite I felt nervous. I was young but what the hell it's gonna be 8 years since the movie was released. Especially the 3D was awesome when I saw it in theaters.

But back to the movie again I'm sorry. I'm not gonna make this a full review I don't wanna waste anyone's time.

When I think about it Sam is a lot better in this film. While I do feel some moments could be worked on. He should of apologized to Bee after he meets him I know Sam's angry. Especially this development of Sam wants to matter. This is much better then what we had in Revenge Of The Fallen.

Carly I honestly find more likable then Mikaela. Seriously I do especially that moment where she literally tells Megatron that he will basically be Sentinel's bitch if he doesn't do anything. She basically treats Sam with a bit more respect and well I like the relationship more then what Sam and Mikaela had.

Lennox and Epps were always great. Especially Epps during the scenes in Chicago. Simmons is seriously entertaining in this and Dutch is a blessing.

Let me just talk about Dylan Gould. This guy he's been on my mind. I made two joke posts him deleted the first one of he's been waiting for that betrayal towards Sam.

Patrick Dempsey honestly and his portrayal of Dylan is a performance that left an impression on me. Because I was actually surprised by his reveal of who he actually was. But seriously this man is a dick and in a way I like him. Despite seeing in the film him talking about making tough choices and him being on the winning side. Yet over the course of the film he starts to take it a bit personal.

While I kept thinking before seeing the film he was enjoying it maybe. But my view on it changed. I just think Patrick Dempsey kind of owns the role.

Yes we should talk about the robots and let me be honest. What I love about this film it's basically the Decepticons strike back. They are basically winning in this film. I love the Chicago invasion scene.

I do feel like the entire Bayformers series yes their should of been more Transformers screen time. Especially the Decepticons in this case. While I feel in Revenge Of The Fallen I can tell Starscream feels like he's a little snarky in some parts. While I know he's kissing up to Megatron to cover his ass. I would of liked some what....I don't know more snarky shit or something Starscream would say or do. Maybe even during his confrontation with Sam he mentioning after the Decepticons win that he would overthrow Megatron and become the winner.

I remember when I was young when I saw this for the first time. For Starscream I had hoped he would betray Megatron yet that would be so much for one film. Because that's Starscream from G1, Animated, and other continuities. At least one last hurrah before he dies.

Especially I remember when I was young I wanted Skids and Mudflap, along with Leo to come back....I was young and I enjoyed Revenge Of The Fallen a lot more okay. Wouldn't mind Leo but their seems to be a bit much but what the hell I wanted Dinobots in this film.(well it's said Skids and Mudflap are shown as cars but they were supposed to die....they did die by Sentinel in the movie comic)

I dig Soundwave in this film. Even Laserbeak these guys are douches but would of liked to seen more Soundwave. Especially I like this little dynamic between Dylan and Soundwave I know that's weird of me to say. Would of liked to seen more.

Shockwave in this film seriously I was hyped for him when I was young and playing the prequel game. I feel it's stupid he's not as important. He should of had more lines and more interactions. I even agree with a comment on YouTube he should of been in the Africa scene.

While he is badass it's stupid how he goes out but give him a better send off and a fight with Optimus Prime. I wanted to see more Shockwave and I think it would of been better if he was voiced by Mark Ryan. Frank Welker didn't do a bad job and he actually had two lines spoken in English.

At least his driller creature is cool. But seriously after all the hype and I want to just put some promotional stuff.

Whatever if this one is official or not. It's just in Shockwave's own words......logical. Or my own words fucking logical.

The reason I'm saying Mark Ryan because of his English accent and I want to be reminded of Corey Burton. Sorry for sounding weird.

Let me say I feel Sentinel Prime is probably the best antagonist actually we've had in a Transformers live action film especially in the Bayformers. Characters like Shatter and Dropkick are great. Even Lockdown was nice. But I liked Sentinel. I'll be honest I was actually surprised when I witnessed his betrayal when I was young. I thought the Decepticons were gonna force him to use the Pillars maybe even Shockwave but what we got was something else.

Also I really liked the scenes with Optimus and Sentinel. I do feel we should of gotten more and had them be longer. Especially I like Optimus in this. I do see their was this father and son or brother like relationship that Bay talked about. But would of liked to seen more.

The other Autobots are alright cool. I do feel the whole Que/Wheeljack thing was just seriously stupid. Especially now before Bumblebee a Wheeljack design that was more accurate. Tragic about the way he died.

Looking back at the film theirs not a lot of Cybertronian scenes but they leave an impact.

Also I really wanna talk about the ending with Optimus, Sentinel, and Megatron. We should of gotten more Megatron I agree.

But the scene where leading up to Optimus killing Sentinel seeing it in action after going through the movie. It is awkward in a way.

Yet I'll be honest Sentinel basically deserved it. In fact of the Decepticons, and Dylan fucking deserved what they got. Because after everything they did their to me was not a way shit would end peacefully or something. Including your hearing this from a Steven Universe fan a show that deals with pacifism and other shit.

I do feel and I've talked about this before but I might delete it now because I'm gonna mention it here. But I feel if the scene went like it was Megatron who kills Sentinel or this dark idea of Sentinel killing himself or even himself dying from wounds. Especially giving Megatron and Optimus more of a fight even with Optimus haven't one arm.

Or hell seriously Bay should of gone with the original that was kept in the novel that Megatron teamed up with Optimus to kill Sentinel and Megatron would stop what he's doing. Also hearing that it would of explored Megatron more. That ending would have his look in The Last Knight make sense that he went to Cybertron after Dark Of The Moon and over time he decided to go back leading the Decepticons. Instead they had to kill him off and the whole Galvatron thing. Even though Megatron got what was coming to him.

Gonna be honest the Starscream death while I like the idea of Sam having the courage to take on Starscream and even killing him. But I do feel Starscream should of died a more I guess epic death.

Especially I weirdly wanted Sam to be all Cade Yeager shooting Decepticons and some how killing them. I mean you Sam jumping on cars and even sliding under them.

Gonna say before seeing the movie I kept thinking Dylan in his fight with Sam should of died a more brutal death. Such as Sam telling him to shut up after the messager comment and beating him to death. But Dylan's death is perfect. Seriously he gets hit in the face with some sort of pole thing and dies by the pillar.

Listen I'm sorry for rambling a lot. This became more of some review or reaction. The action was seriously nice and the special effects, score was always excellent.

Gonna be honest while I wasn't emotional much throughout the movie. Did feel emotional over the, "The fight will be your own" scene and felt a little at the, "No Prisoners Only Trophies" scene....that should of had more weight. I'll be honest when I was young I was expecting Sam for some reason come out of hiding yelling no in slow motion, surprising everyone then the Decepticon drop ship gets hijacked.

Gonna say did enjoy Wheelie and Brains I like them. Glad they we're still around in later films.

I think I've talked too much. Basically I think this is the best Bayformers sequel, this is what we should got gotten as a sequel to the 2007 film. It's better then Revenge Of The Fallen, Age Of Extinction, and The Last Knight.

My only weird complaint that isn't towards the movie.....Dinobots could of been in this some how.....during the battle of Chicago. We should of gotten Dinobots vs the Driller. Grimlock voiced by Vin Diesel or whatever I've had that weird casting idea I think for years. Or even Devastator in this because it's a huge open battle with so many opportunities. While I understand Michael Bay didn't wanna go larger like he did with Revenge Of The Fallen. I'm just disappointed that the next film we got after this was Age Of Extinction.

Tags dealt with sorry that got wrong, their was a lot to talk about. Glad I could talk about this and again I finished my to do list of rewatching the original trilogy. Bring on the new cinematic universe in the Knightverse that started out with Travis Knight's Bumblebee I'm ready for more excellent films.

[taltos-seidmadr]

Hello, I rebloged your post. Bday: 07/03/99 My question is how Eros, Morpheus and Hypnos feel about me? Thank you in advance! -S. Cancer

This is reading 3 out of 8 (they may be out of order). At the moment of me writing this, there are no slots left, but you can still get a reading in exchange for a small donation.

I saw, thank you S! I have prepared some respectful offerings and invited them in to speak. But you should know that I never interacted with these deities before so if you feel like something is not quite right or I have misinterpreted something, trust yourself before what I say. I will also try to describe the cards in the most neutral way possible so you can make your own judgement.

Eros

eight of cups: abandonment, letting go, looking deeper, reading between the lines, freeing yourself from a bad situation, feeling weary king of coins: prosperity, provider, breadwinner, faithful partner, positive father figure, loyalty knight of cups: gentleman, following your heart, proposition of romance, invitation to action, imagination, creativity king of wands: optimism, a wise but also practical leader, charisma, taking control

Okay so that's... a lot. I dont know if you have worked with Eros before but if you haven't, they would REALLY like to work with you (keep in mind this is still up to you, you can say no if you want). However based on these cards I rather get the feeling that you and Eros know each other very well, and Eros would really like to play a much more important part in your life than he does currently. I thought that the eight of cups represents you or something you have gone through, in the past. It seems like... something bad might have happened? I'm sorry if that's true. The reading doesn't really go into this and it doesn't seem completely relevant... it could also simply mean the wish that your connection becomes deeper.

The person cards seem like all these roles that he wants to take on for you, he wants to provide for you, be your loyal foundation, etc. It's almost as if he wanted to take some kind of major guiding role in your life. Undeniably, the knight of cups very explicitly means a romantic proposal so... 😳 If that's a thing that has been discussed between you two then the answer seems like a very enthusiastic yes. But if you don't have that in mind, I wouldn't jump into it too hastily since his domain is so close to romance. Maybe he just plans to bring a new relationship into your life.

No matter what, based on these cards I would think his opinion of you is very affectionate and positive.

Morpheus

the magician reversed: lack of mental clarity, untapped potential, deception queen of coins: constantly renewing wealth and success, witch, mother figure, nurturing, prosperity

You have a very impressive talent - most likely in a form of magic - that you haven't tried yet or paid enough attention to. Given that we are talking about Morpheus, I'm thinking of dream magic or something dream related, or else why would he bring it up? This was markedly the only thing he wanted to say. When I asked him if he actually wants you to work on this with him or just wanted to point this out for some reason, I pulled

ace of pentacles: new job, investment, manifestation

Whatever you decide, I don't think he feels any type of way about it, but he would be absolutely open to a collaboration if you are interested.

Hypnos

queen of wands: a person who accomplishes a lot, multitasker, charismatic and funny person, carreer woman eight of wands: movement, change, momentum, progress, energy four of wands: homecoming, celebration, being proud of an achievement

Based on these cards I think that he is extremely proud of how far you have come, and this is doubly true if you have been working together or if he has been teaching you something. This seems like a very "constant" opinion if you will, like there's nothing that's supposed to change from it. I pulled another card to clarify this, which was

nine of cups: a wish coming true, happiness and joy, success

If you ever doubted yourself whether what you are doing is good enough, be assured that he is very pleased, you are on the right path and there is nothing that you have to change in the bigger scheme of things. Just keep up the good work! 😊

tip💖

[ethermaster-blog]

Maybe I'm just an asshole,

but I'm beginning to seriously loathe this rabid hatred toward Metal Gear Survive. At first it was just off the backlash of konami axing kojima because he used too much of their money. (80 million, i think it was?. Kojima was paid a salary, so it didnt matter to him how much of their money he spent) but here we are, a year and a half later, and the hearsay and blaming has only gotten worse.

(Oh for fucks sake, I guess I'm not a "true" fan now. Fucking purists)

What is it about this face loyalty? This die hard dedication? I came off a 2 year old video by Angry Joe just now by sheer curiosity, concerning MG Survive's first trailer back in '16. His first words after it was done was (extremely loudly mind you) along the lines of "shitty ass generic zombie game."

This asshole with the throbbing red crystal sprouting out of what's left of his head, jumping at the other asshole in a blue parka doesn't seem like a generic zombie to me. Does it seem that way to you? I shouldn't be surprised, people like jumping guns.

Let's look at the flipside of things. What of Kojima himself? Death Stranding certainly looks impressive, I'll give it that, along with its mysterious presentation... But we haven't gotten a shred of gameplay in the last 4 years its been in development, let alone any cohesive narrative, let alone for what the story could possibly be with how eldritch and strange it looks.

We have mads mikkleson (I probably just butchered his name, sorry) as kojimas new David Hayter, if you catch my meaning. Never mind the fact that kojima completely cut contact off from Hayter without explaination when Ground Zeroes was being developed. Interestingly, kojima was hanging out around Hollywood taking pictures of his breakfast and taking selfies with troy baker around this time as well.

We know Kojima basically invented Metal Gear and we love him for it. We know he also wasn't alone. Sure, he was executive, director, and writer, but he didn't make the whole series himself. Concept artists, producers, music, dev team, voice actors, motion capture direction, Kris Zimmerman herself and many of the driving links behind idea solidity weren't ALL him. What about them? Why just kojima? Because he was the face of it all? Because he interacted the most? That seems awfully shallow for a *true fan* to ignore.

If you didn't know, the MG Survive beta was out recently. It ran from the 18th, to the 21st of this month. And wouldn't you know; people (for the most part) seemed to like it.

What I bet most of you don't know is that Kojima only took Ken Imaizumi, a wealthy producer, and Yoji Shinkawa himself, THE premier MGS concept artist, when KojiPro was shut down by konami, with him to Sony.

What about everyone else?

Konamis as-of-yet-unnamed-studio actually retains a good portion of kojimas old team at KojiPro. The reason MG survive feels like a metal gear game is because it is-- its just not a metal gear SOLID game. Konami, while making questionable choices in business, aren't stupid. They didn't completely get rid of the silent hill IP, and they were smart enough to label mg survive as a spin-off. Or did everyone suddenly forget what spin-off means?

Like Metal Gear Acid and Rising, Survive is in the same universe, but detached from the ongoing narrative.

While Kojima can make great games, he has the tendency to let his projects spiral wildly out of control without supervision. And in a perfect world, this would be great-- but such things would cost a company millions of dollars left unchecked. Its partly why The Phantom Pain was as expensive as it was.

Take this with a grain of salt. I shouldn't have to say this, but common sense isn't so common. Play the game yourself and come to your own conclusions. Cast not ye judgement unless proven guilty of sin- or ye be guilty yourself.